@tw0lle Oof. Yeah, I've definitely prioritized travel over paying off student loan debt faster. But, as you pointed out, travel at 33 is different from travel at 23, and I'm afraid that if I put off my biggest travel dreams long enough, I might have kids and just...never get there. I'm willing to be penalized the extra year or two of interest to avoid that. And, I mean, for places like Venice or the Antarctic, I feel like time is a very real concern.
@Duckles AND leaving aside the can of worms that is attempting to dress professionally in the process of gestating and recovering from gestating a person. Oy.
On Morning Reminder: The Billfold Book Club is Discussing the Second Half of 'North and South' Next Thursday
I think the Mrs. Gaskell thing is a Victorian holdover. It's what you do if you're in with the Gaskell in crowd? Also: squee!
@bgprincipessa I think it is different now! I didn't even consider taking my husband's name when we got married, because I am a bitter, feminist, misandrist shrew (yay!), but the only moment of heartburn I had was over the possibility that it would cause issues with future hypothetical offspring. Fortunately, Mr. bowtiesarecool grew up in a family where NOBODY had the same last name, and people were much more confused by the fact that his (step)brother was only a month younger than him than anything to do with anyone's name. (He likes to tell people that he's an only child, and so is his brother.) And they traveled internationally and went to public school and nobody was traumatized or anything.
Man, I grew up in the sticks, with forests and farms for neighbors. I would regularly spend Halloween getting dropped off with my friends by someone's mom in one of the downtown neighborhoods to trick or treat, because then there were actual houses within walking distance of each other. Similarly, now that I live in a restricted-access apartment building, I suspect the kids in my neighborhood will go to the nearby neighborhoods that have front doors accessible from the street. Is this not a thing that kids everywhere have always done, when possible? It's just like prioritizing the house that gives out quarters or Kennedy half-dollars, and avoiding the one that gives out toothbrushes.
@Miss_B Cold pizza is the breakfast of champions.
@EM Yeah, we travel fairly regularly anyway and for our honeymoon we: 1) Splurged sliiiiightly more than we usually do on travel, 2) Made a point to slow down and relax alone together a little more than we usually do on trips, and 3) Told everyone with ears that it was our honeymoon, resulting in free desserts and good wishes and rose petals. Highly recommend.
@Marille I agree about Mr. Hale! And I realize that's how families were run at the time, but the way he just unilaterally decides, ok, we're going to be much poorer and unhappier now because I feel funny about the direction of the Church! It seems...dishonorable, somehow, even though he claims he's doing it for reasons of honor? Especially when so many other people in the book, like the Bouchers, are just desperately trying to survive.
I think you really hit the nose on the head with Margaret's big problem being that she doesn't know where she fits in Milton. Like, leaving aside that she twice rejects the role of "wife" (for different reasons, I think) and obviously can't lower herself to be a mill worker, the class and gender roles are all different there. I thought the bit where the Hales couldn't find servants to be particularly telling, because it seems like Milton does not have and does not want a gentry class, particularly not one that expects loyalty from employees because of bloodlines, rather than money. Also, I can't ever really tell if we're supposed to like Mr. Hale, but I just can't stand him. He acts like such a delicate flower in a book full of strong, gritty people, what with bringing his family to the bring of genteel poverty over philosophical issues, and being too delicate to be told his own wife is dying. Just...ugh. Mrs. Thorton is dreadful, but at least she has gumption.
I am always in favor of more access to reproductive health options for everyone! So, I think that's pretty cool. That being said, nooooo I would never avail myself of such a thing. Self injection ain't happenin'. My feelings about needles and applying them to myself are so strong that Mr. bowtiesarecool and I had a very blunt conversation prior to getting married that basically entailed me making it very clear that giving myself shots was my line in the sand, and that if we couldn't make babies the easy way, we were just going to have to go get some non-bio kids instead, if he still felt strongly about it. But this is a great option for people who are not as squeamish as me!