@The Dauphine I had a friend whose parents divorced when his mom became too debilitated by MS to stay out of a nursing home. It was *not* bc they couldn't afford it, but bc his father did not want to afford it. My friend really held it against him (as you would expect). Your parents situation is fundamentally different.
@levangieg To your point this: "White parents see their kids dodge a murder charge with an ‘affluenza’ excuse while minority parents have to hope their kids don’t get summarily executed in a Wal-Mart or after a car accident." still has the same issue. It's *rich* white parents with the affluenza thing, and (lets face it) almost exclusively black parents (both poor and rich) who have to worry about their kids getting shot.
"$1380 a month is $16,560 a year to have someone else wipe your child’s nose and give them blocks to chew on and sing the ABCs for the forty zillionth time." Haha--that's more 'care' than you'd get for $320/week many places. That amount of individual attention frequently comes only with a nanny. And let's not get started on that...
"in a 8′x5′ section of a hospital room, cordoned off by puke green curtains" Further proof that NYC is actually in a third word country...
@garli ""what's your source on that" (eg: Nowadays, women leave perfectly kind, helpful husbands for reasons that seem mysterious.)" Um, duh, all of the author's bitter, divorced, drinkin' buddies.
@garli I presume that was directed to me--Flip it around--how is 'being content' “a marriage of far-above-average quality”? Guess it's a matter of where "content" fits on the emotion scale in one's interpretation; I see it as a very middle of the road state--good enough to not make an effort for better, not fantastico (*necessarily*--of course one would *also* be content with fantastico). Oh, and PS, I'n NOT saying that I think that "a marriage of far-above-average quality" is a reasonable thing to expect, or even necessarily to strive for, but since that was the thesis of the quote (that people *expect* that), and I ain't clicking thru to that dreck, that's what I was working from.
"The dream of being contently coupled" Ester--you just did the 'lowered expectations' thing; the premise is "a marriage of far-above-average quality"--like the kiss at the end of The Princess Bride, only in decades-long marriage form. The *dream* is of having a Hollywood-quality marriage, not 'being content'.
Also, this: "the unfriendliness of New Yorkers. At least we let you in the door before we starve you out again" You do realize, Ester, that "regulation" includes rent control, and there are decades of writing (see, eg. Yglesias' The Rent is Too Damned High) discussing how NYC's rent control has limited the development of new rental building in Manhattan for decades. So, if one is judging 'friendliness' by the degree that extant regulation has allowed for a housing equilibrium to develop, then NYC is approximately as unfriendly to outsiders as EsEff.
@therealjaygatsby "if only they'd stop building the same glass and steel monstrosities" Height limit and cost of land has a lot to do with that. glass and steel allows maximizing the interior space within that rather constrained cube.
"materials and land cost 2x the national average in SF" Harharharhar. Materials + *labor* may be two times the "national average" (w/o digging, seems a *bit* too high), but LAND? C'mon. Your 'national average' buildable lot for a "normal" house is probably $50,000. That would just about buy you a surface parking spot in a so-so location in EsEff. A 'normal' buildable lot (ie, not one that requires a tiny house, or heroic cantilevers, or anything) that would permit building a 'normal sized' residential building is going to be 10 to 20+ times as much. Land in San Francisco only 2 times as much as average? Invalidates all other discussion that follows, bc the premise is *that* faulty.