These are all good tips! Buying maternity clothes felt like a big bummer to me; maybe for everybody. My birthday came in my first trimester and my mom sent me a check for clothes so I would feel less bad about it. The consignment shop worked for Ester, but the parenting listserve in LA worked for me. Source of three pairs of jeans, one pair of work trousers, and one extremely comfy dress, twenty bucks each. And I felt connected enough to the seller I'm even following up on her day care recommendation. I guess it's hit or miss. If you don't happen to live in a high-density area, I think ebay can really provide for you. If you pick selectively, Old Navy has some decent maternity offerings. A maxi dress, a tunic top. They are not crazy high quality but they fit well enough and they lasted me through the pregnancy. I also had to add some extra things piecemeal for special occasions. I got through probably six fancy dinners, two weddings, and one work presentation! Also, this Fast Company piece by Emily Gould really resonated with me: http://www.fastcompany.com/3041328/body-week/why-being-pregnant-ruined-shopping
didn't Mike write about the hiring story on Backchannel? Am I going crazy?
SILVER OWL NECKLACE.
@HelloTheFuture @ronswansonluva "One stuffed animal on the bed, because I am at my core a monogamist."
I LOVE that Nicole has multiple owl necklaces in different colors. You should all read her "Talking to Yourself with Owls," which I only just discovered. And her owl motif gave me all kinds of warm fuzzies because my newborn daughter has the initials OWL. My husband and I thought that was awesome because owls are cute and fierce and the symbol of Athena. It does bring rather an onslaught of owl-themed baby gifts from loved ones. But, I mean, they're adorable so why not. Back to one of the points from the conversation: I do plan outfits for long trips, but then I always make compromises in the interest of packing lighter and regret it when I bring the less comfortable more fashionable shoes or vice versa. Really a girl needs like 6 pairs of shoes on any trip longer than 48 hours. How does one avoid the Baby Industrial Complex? I feel like we are spending less money than we budgeted but only because we budgeted too much when we were told that Babies Are Expensive. In actuality pretty much any new problem comes along and I order something online. Heat not working? Order more blankets. Hate washing bottles in the office sink? Order extra parts. Our food spending is way down, though, even with having groceries delivered. We are going on a warm-weather trip in three weeks so I guess we'll test whether or not I buy a whole bunch of new stuff just for that.
I can't wait until having a kid in day care wipes out my years of not getting sick.
Hi! Previously a regular commenter, I've been away for 10 weeks since the birth of my daughter. But this post hits all kinds of current feelings. My husband has no siblings, and I have two sisters. He wants only one child, and I want two. We have agreed to table this discussion until it makes sense to have it again. And I have to say, though I will be disappointed if I don't have two children, I can easily see from this vantage point that I can reconcile myself to either one or two, once we've made the decision. There are pros and cons to each and no wrong answer. My husband's position is mainly based on resources: it makes him anxious thinking about providing for two kids. We are really, truly privileged, and there's no way this is an actual barrier, but it is an important psychological fact for him. And as an only child, he thinks not dividing emotional energy helps the child feel secure. He is also a very generous, loving, kind human being, and he got there without having to argue over toys, so it can be done. What do I think? I think sibling bonds are deep and precious, especially in adulthood. Yes, it helps to have a buddy as you face your parents' failing health, but also when you get married, when you have your own children. Watching my daughter recognize the voices of her aunts stands out as a vital, unforgettable moment. And though I think only children can be taught to share, there is something preconscious in the way I or my sisters take care of each other. I want to provide that feeling for my child. So we'll talk some more one day, but I believe whatever we choose, the kid'll be all right.
Are there fewer "Do 1 Thing"-ers this week than normal? Chiming in just to keep it going. I had a baby 12 days ago (on her due date!), and my 1 thing is to figure out how much money to put in the dependent care spending account and the flexible spending account. I may outsource all or part of this task to my husband. So my other 1 thing is to put together the shopping list for Thanksgiving groceries.
EAST SIDE BRIDE!!! So excited to see the author's name I haven't even read the piece yet.