I've got some bad news for you Allison. Your father doesn't know the money is all gone. He thinks you're being responsible about it and that you don't want to touch the principle. Tou say it's in your nature to be irresponsible (to buy things you don't actually have any need for). That's a choice, it's not in your nature. You're intentionally destroying yourself financially through repetitive bad / irrational choices. Blaming it on some mythical uncontrollable factor like your 'nature' is just indicative that you haven't learned any lessons. You're remorseful, but you haven't decided to actually kill off the behavior that caused the damage, it's just in remission. I see more financial cliffs in your future, if this article is any indication of where you're at mentally.