On When One Person Earns More Than the Other in a Relationship

@garli "if both people involved don’t feel like their life is easier/better because of their partner" Exactly. These sorts of articles seem to be asking "is my life easier/better *THAN* my partner's?" which is absolutely the wrong question.

Posted on March 31, 2014 at 3:45 pm 1

On When One Person Earns More Than the Other in a Relationship

I'm getting kind of bored with the whole "I make less money and have more free time and do the dishes more why does s/he resent me waah!!?!" narrative. My fiancé makes about 2x what I do, but I work as much or more (guess what, 13 hour days in a "practically chosen" health/science field are not always super well compensated!) and I would be willing to bet that's a more common setup than we see in the media. On our part, we split expenses about 50/50 (he has some weird hangups about money/savings after a bad period of freelancing before we met, although I hope to bring him around to the percentage method if I don't get a higher-paying position soon). Do I sometimes get mad when he's like "oh I feel like buying *expensive unnecessary toy* for myself, I had a hard month at work, I deserve it" and I'm like "this candle I got was probably too expensive ):" or when I usually end up doing more of the housework because I'm the woman in the relationship? Sure! but I don't turn it into some giant existential crisis about the value of life and our relative work.

Posted on March 31, 2014 at 3:18 pm 0