On Mom Advice
@readyornot When I was in college one of the 40,000 times I broke with my (then)boyfriend was over Mother's Day weekend (I had come home to NJ from Boston to see him ... and I guess my mom, as an afterthought). I NEVER told my parents about our break ups because I figured they'd say, "ugh, this is the 38,985th time! Stop going to back to him! You're stupid!" But instead, this time, I couldn't hold back the tears and they knew it and my mom said the best Mother's Day present would be to let them drive me back up to school and we would all eat chowder at Quincey Market together so I wouldn't mope around at home and land up driving to his dorm in the middle of the night. MOMS.
I carry a lot of petty cash for my production job - often in hundres - but since it's weird to send a PA out to get a coffee with a hundy, I usually land up spending my small bills or using my debit card and repaying myself in Benjamins. This leads to a Friday night when I go out to dinner with my friends, spend the night complaining about how broke I am, and then can't pay cash on the bill because I only have hundreds.
@highjump I agree!! If I didn't think starting a relationship with her would lead me into a lifetime worth of heartache (and debt), I'd be in love. Oh hell, I am in love!!
@Megano! Yeah, listen, I know it's redic, but we had this shitty plastic garbage can that my cat would DESTROY so we had to kick it up a notch - http://preview.tinyurl.com/co3zyxl ANNNND - this is kinda like our work bench. We have too much space in the living room (1st world problems) so we're using it as a bookshelf/display table/bar/purse holder - http://preview.tinyurl.com/ca3b4lz Listen, we're pretty regulary $1 store shoppers so yeah, this is a splurge but NO SHAME. It's a reward to ourselves for.... uh.... not killing each other yet?
I always feel guilty about saying no, because the truth is, if it's something I REALLY want to do, I'll find the cash (because, duh, I've heard of Visa!), but I will say no on account of low funds when it's a person or activity I'm not interested in. But then I think that the friends I say no to will see my check in at X Fancy Restaurant on Facebook and think "Well, she must just not like me!" and then they'll stop inviting me out. Hmmm... I guess that's not so bad. Moral of the story: People I don't like with shitty plans - stop asking me to hang out, I'm poor.
My insurance will pay 70% of my bill up to $100 per session, which seems ok, but when I doctor charged me her full rate ($150/session), they'd pay $100 and I'd pay $50 which came to $200 a month at least ($300-$450 on particularly hard months that required morning phone sessions on the way to work). So now she writes me a bill for $150/session but only charges me $120/session. After insurance reimburses I pay $20 per session. Is it legal? Probably not. Is it incredibly helpful? Yes. I've been going to this woman for nearly 3 years now and rarely miss a week, but when I do - when I think I'm doing alright and can take off a session and save some cash and time - I land up spending money on things I wouldn't have bought otherwise. This includes the occasional pair of "sad pants", but more often turns into elaborate gifts for my parents or friends in an attempt to say, "I'm ok! I'm generous! Can I buy your love?" The general answer is "no".
CONGRATULATIONS LITTLE LADY!!!!!!!!! Your ability to get through your debt is inspiring. My thing for today is to order enough contact lenses so that I use all the money I had put away in my PayFlex account. I just realized I contributed $12 a paycheck (pre-tax) so that I could pay for medical-related expenses and I never used any of it!! I can order 6 boxes of contact lenses FOR FREE and I'll be set for years.
@eagerber It was a good idea! And I think it went very well. Although, I don't know if anything will prepare us for living together until it happens. This was kinda just like... playing house over vacation. Maybe we'll talk about it the next time we publicly decide to document this journey (assuming we don't get any other death threat jokes :/ ).
@Reginal T. Squirge Umm... Happy Holidays? Bryan and I will make sure it states in our respective wills that you are notified of our deaths. Don't party too hard.
@selenana I had not thought about bringing lunch to a coffee shop. That is a fantastic idea. AND the idea of getting a beverage makes eating a sandwich out of a baggie less depressing. We do have a kitchen, but there is one small table which is usually reserved for one small woman who has worse social skills than myself. I'd try making friends, but I fear she'd knock my tray into my face and steal my tater tots.