@stuffisthings Ha! By the way, I always get emigrant and immigrant confused. If I came from another country to live in this one, am I an emigrant?
@honey cowl When I was 8 or 9, I told my (immigrant, very poor at the time) parents I wanted to be an artist/writer, and they told me that while I was very talented, I should just be a lawyer instead because they make more money. I wonder what people in my generation (27 years old) will tell their kids to be someday?
@tenya The piece irked me, but I love and agree with your comment so much even though you basically summarized what I guess the piece was trying to say. Little superstitions to keep away the mistakes of your parents, and to make them proud.
@aperson Agreed - I was flippant in my comment, but had I actually gotten into an Ivy League, no matter what the financial pitfalls were, I'm sure my parents would have felt incredible guilt not being able to "give me what I/they wanted." Not to say I didn't experience incredible guilt for a few years during and after college for not being good enough to get into an Ivy League, but at least there were no decisions that had to be made! I think it's hard to say no to your kids when it comes to something that's "good" for them - no staying out late is one thing, but no private college where they have xyz perks and abc professors and shiny sparkly major is a whole different beast.
@sunflowernut Agreed - "having it all," in whatever sense of the word, does not mean almost being able to afford J.Crew and contemplating Lululemon leggings (which are really terrible quality now, so save your $). Kids are expensive - there's no question about that. But I was hoping there'd be a - we don't have kids so we have money to travel, or to help out our parents financially, or to volunteer more or to...I don't know. Something besides a condo and shopping. I am pretty ambivalent on children and turning 28 this year, and I definitely don't think children are the be all and end all to life, but I also don't want to read something I wrote 10 years later wherein I did a cost-benefit analysis that basically summed up to: kids or whole foods sandwiches?
It sounds like the author's parents struggled with having their kids so young, couldn't pursue their dreams, and the author internalized having kids as having no money/making mistakes. She states she makes 4x what her parents made when they had her, so even if she did have kids, wouldn't she still be doing better than they did? I dunno, I don't have kids so I don't feel personally affronted by this, it just sounds like a specious argument. Pretty sure at $100k, you can have whole foods sandwiches AND a kid (if you wanted to).
Great advice! Another (maybe obvious?) thing I learned from a buyer from Buffalo Exchange - they don't launder the clothes after they buy them, so if you stuff your clothes in the bag and they get wrinkled, they are more likely to get turned down.
@SterlingCooper05 @SterlingCooper05 My dad had Ivy League stars in his eyes, and told me once that if I got into Harvard, he'd live on the streets to pay my tuition. Luckily for all involved, I didn't get into any Ivy League and end up at a (good) state school with $5,000/semester tuition. The lesson here to avoid staggering loans is to have practical parents or have average grades.
@Franny Ha! Isn't it funny how offices are hotbeds of the some of the least scandalous gossip? We had a guy show up in nice, leather sneakers on "casual" Fridays and people were SCANDALIZED. Like office doors closed, lots of hushed whispers. Finally, the poor admin had to talk with him about his shoes. People get bored, man. But yes, shorts are risque.