I'm really enjoying the conversational style of the posts on the Billfold, especially yours and Logan's - I feel so much more engaged in thinking about my relationship with money. Other financial advice sites I've been to tend to either frighten me: "You'll die in poverty!" or give me a false sense of optimism: "5 easy steps to financial freedom". You guys rock.
That totally works, getting an offer and going back to your company to match it. There was a cost though, when I did it, in bad feelings. People running the two co.s knew each other. And the guy who tried to poach me made a big deal about, "We're going to run an ad, and we want you to answer it." And I said fine. And I told them that I would let my company try to match the offer before I accepted, but they weren't really worried. And then my company did match it, and now everyone's mad. My co. mad at them, and them mad at me. Weirdly, my company also made a big deal about, Did they recruit you or did you go to them? Which seems immaterial to me. We all knew each other socially. I knew they were looking for people. We had lunch. They emailed me first, and that makes them slime? They wanted my people to think I'd answered an ad, because that would make them blameless? It all made me feel very nice and appreciated, though I did feel like I needed to kick ass around the office for a good long time. I wouldn't have done it if I hadn't been pretty sure I'd be forgiven. The big question is, How wrecked would your company be if you left? Especially on shortish notice. Be sure to mention the proposed start date. That will make them really shake.