On Chatting About Work Trips and Expense Guilt

Take a freaking cab dude. Help the economy. :) I take cabs where there's a major time issue, or I've got my luggage with me. My coworkers and I are in the habit of ordering two drinks with dinner if we feel like it and expensing it, there tends to be a lot more booze if somebody higher up is buying, and it's a company rule that the highest ranking person at the table takes care of the bill if it's being expensed. When I did a ton of international travel for work I would buy my books ahead (Kindle) and some snacks (Trader Joe's) but buy a magazine, a bottle of water, and something else snacky at the airport on the company dime. The only expense I ever had questioned was a hotel car (nicer and more convenient than a cab) ride from Rabat to Casablanca in Morocco, and I think it was only like $30 US, including tip. They didn't care about the cost, they just couldn't read the receipt which was in Arabic. I think I ended up eating the cost. Still worth it though.

Posted on September 12, 2014 at 9:54 pm 0

On Thirtysomethings Just As Delusional as Twentysomethings

@NoName That sounds great! I'm out of town next week and the first week in October, but otherwise I'm around and up for anything.

Posted on September 12, 2014 at 1:08 pm 0

On Thirtysomethings Just As Delusional as Twentysomethings

42 years old. I gave up entirely (and wasn't particularly depressed about it) on the idea of a long term relationship after being single for the better part of a decade at 35. I figured I'd still date and hook up occasionally and was fine with it. And then I hooked up with a guy at a conference and a year later he moved across the country to live with me and now we own a house together and have been married just over a year. But you don't get everything you want. I had cancer (I'm in remission now), lost my ovaries and pretty much any possibility of kids. Most places will not let you adopt or foster after a certain age, and/or for at least five years after a cancer diagnosis. I'm tired now. Adopting at 47? I don't think so. And I've got a great career and a very good paycheck but only 70k in my 401k right now. Expenses of the cancer year ate away a significant chunk of what was there. I'm saving aggressively now to build it back up, but I've lost so much time. On the plus side my husband is only 33 so he can support me in my dotage. I've definitely had more flashes of adulthood this year than ever before - being that sick and coming that close to death (within hours at two different times, and I would have died if my husband hadn't forced me into the car to go to the hospital both times) - but most of the time I still don't feel like an adult. I never eat enough vegetables. I always run out of underwear before the laundry gets done. Sometimes I forget to scoop the cat box for a couple of days. We have three bathrooms and a CostCo membership and still manage to run completely out of toiletpaper at least twice a year. I was thrilled to my very toes to discover a dispensary in Berkeley that delivers perfectly legal pot to my front door. I'm not sure what my definition of grown up is, but it isn't any of those things.

Posted on September 9, 2014 at 10:53 pm 4

On The Ultimate Hummus Showdown

My favorite hummus is the "mediterranean style" with pine nuts. I've never been able to make one I like better that the Trader Joe's version, so I just buy theirs, or sometimes the giant tub of Sabra if they have it at CostCo. I did manage to perfect a recipe for tzatziki that outdoes anything I've ever purchased, and I make that regularly through the summer. I like to put them both out for a snack or appetizers - good with pitas or veggies to dip.

Posted on September 5, 2014 at 4:20 pm 0

On Going Above and Beyond Doesn't Help You

@garli I worked for a company that gave no fives to give you something to reach for, which was then purchased by a company that scales more like TheEstablishment's system. But my company also explicitly tells us that "reviews are not tied to raises and bonuses" - not kidding about that. So we do self rating, and I gave up and just give myself fives across the board and let my manager take me down a peg if he feels like he wants to.

Posted on August 30, 2014 at 3:55 pm 0

On Help, a Direct Mailing For a Cleaning Service Actually Worked On Me And I'm Worried It Will Ruin My Relationship

I'd go ahead and do this as a one-off and tip the cleaner very well. We have a housecleaner - my relationship would not have survived if we couldn't afford to do it. Over the years I tried a mix of services and independent people and always felt better about the independent people, because I know they're getting every penny I pay them, and I pay them well. We live in a ridiculously tall and skinny four story townhouse and pay $140 every week - a bedroom and two offices, three baths, deep clean the kitchen, vacuum/mop all the floors and ALL THE STAIRS. She is the best. It's expensive, but it's Bay Area so everything is expensive and she's doing work my husband won't do for any price (not out of revulsion or thinking he's too good for it, he doesn't notice the mess and is too lazy to deal with it). My advice, if you like having someone come, start asking around for referrals to independent people. We found the person who works for us that way - she's been working for several of our friends for more than a decade now.

Posted on August 30, 2014 at 2:51 pm 0

On The Billfold Book Club: David Allen's 'Getting Things Done'

@nnlsbin Asana has a solid app. It's a lot easier to do the setup and major task input from a computer, but once you've done the big typing, it's easy to maintain via an app on your phone.

Posted on August 29, 2014 at 9:37 pm 0

On The Billfold Book Club: David Allen's 'Getting Things Done'

@nnlsbin I've used Omnifocus (Mac, expensive), RememberTheMilk (Free and Pro), and I use Asana.com (free) now. I really liked Omnifocus, but I got a new manager at work and he likes to use Asana for team based projects, and it works pretty well, so I've switched my personal stuff there too. It's easy for my husband and I to be a "team" and get household stuff organized that way too.

Posted on August 29, 2014 at 5:48 pm 0

On Saying "No I Can't" Because of Money

I feel like this is such an age related thing - I'm 42 and, I suspect, a bit older than most folks here. I'm at a point in life where my default is "no" and I have to think through the yes answers. Would I love to go to your destination whatever? Sure! Am I actually going to shell out more than $250 (including gift) to see anybody other than my sister ever get married again? Hell no.

Posted on August 18, 2014 at 8:07 pm 0

On Saying "No I Can't" Because of Money

@katethegreat Yup. I was so relieved when 20% said no.

Posted on August 18, 2014 at 8:02 pm 0