@Sureok "And you don't even make enough money to pay for the child's care?" Many many women don't make enough money to pay for childcare. For many women continuing to work while paying for childcare is an investment in future earnings/career benefits, not a way to actually make enough money to justify paying for childcare. They can live on her husband's income without her working, so I'm not sure why this wasn't an okay choice in your book. Also, she never said she was interested in "pursuing a career has a playwright, actor, blogger, screenwriter, tutor, and babysitter." To go out on a very short limb, I am going to assume that babysitting and tutoring are jobs she does to make money; I'd imagine her career focus has more to do with the other creative pursuits. It doesn't seem at all unreasonable to take time off from the majority of her income-earning pursuits to care for her child (babysitting someone else's kid and then paying someone else to babysitting your own child would be a strange choice) and then use the rest of her time to focus on perhaps not-very-lucrative but important steps that will help her career trajectory in theater and film as her child gets older and goes to school, especially if her husband makes enough money to make this plan feasible.
You can feel like yourself and moderately comfortable in work clothes (if/when you need to wear them)! It will never be as comfortable as sweats, of course, but you just have to refine your professional style, in the same way that you've had decades to develop your casual style. The best professional clothes DO require more money upfront, though, and I really think that it's impossible to be comfortable and look good/like yourself in cheap professional clothes (unlike casual clothes, where you can really just go budget and still look great). I think fabric is most important: silk, wool, cotton. No polyester!!!! It is scratchy and cheap-looking and makes you feel like you're pretending to look professional but aren't. I'm not busty so a button-down does work for me, but if you are, get one of those specially-made for bustier women shirts, or skip the button-down altogether and go for jersey and silk blouses. A quality wrap dress is EXCELLENT, people will compliment you on it all the time, it's so comfortable you won't take it off when you get home, and you'll look dressed up. Ankle-length skinny-ish pants, in black and maybe one other color (khaki, or bold), look great with flats and can be dressed up with heels. Cardigans. Cardigans with belts around the waist. In winter, low-heeled booties are a lifesaver. Lots of cute flats and slightly glammier sandals than you're used to. In sum, here's what I'd get if I had to build a work wardrobe from the bottom up. Obviously I prefer black as a base color but you could do whatever neutral you're comfortable in. All of this stuff would run you a pretty penny, but you wouldn't need all of it at once (multi-seasonal) and I've had most of these pieces for 4-5 years, still running strong. Black pants I feel GOOD in; probably cotton with some stretch Second pair of pants, maybe in brighter color or khaki; if you don't like/hate pants, do a second skirt Wool skirt for winter, probably in neutral color Summer-y skirt; bring in some color/pattern Wrap dress Shift dress; both these dresses should be multi-season +/- tights, sweaters Long-sleeved silk blouse; pattern ok (check out Everlane) Nice-looking white shirt of some kind; whatever feels comfortable and makes you look good 3-4 colorful or patterned short-sleeved or sleeveless blouses Tank/shell for underneath blazers/cardigans Black cardigan/blazer Colorful cardigan/blazer Neutral belt Colorful belt Black tights Moderately colorful tights; perhaps in wool for winter Black low-heeled (and comfortable) booties for winter Black flats/low-heeled shoes Colored flats/low-heeled shoes/clogs Dressy sandals for summer One pair of heels to keep under your desk if it's that kind of place Then bring accessories—scarves, statement necklaces/earrings, patterned tights—in from what you already have to both feel more like yourself and look more put-together!
Another side-note: I would absolutely take the same precautions as you did, but it's good to keep in mind, if in the throes of freaking-out, that the chances of contracting HIV, from a single P-in-V intercourse event without protection, with a partner who is not on antiretrovirals, are fewer than 1/100. (CDC citation: http://www.cdc.gov/hiv/policies/law/risk.html) Of course, 1% risk is much higher than the much lower risk you had with protection and understandably frightening, but chances were extremely high that you would not have gotten HIV even if you never took any medication.
Where should I take my broken fancy Alessi teakettle (hand-me-down) whose spring is loose, allowing all the steam to escape before reaching the whistle and thus depriving me of its melodic three-note trill? I think they sell the springs online, but once I have the spring there's no way I will be capable of re-springing it, and I can't think of who I could pay to do this for me. Any ideas?
@readyornot Yeah, my developmental biology teacher backs up the nipple stimulation thing! Definitely worth doing, low cost (Billfold-friendly?). My friend was overdue and decided fuck it, I'm going out to dinner and a rock concert tonight. Her water broke at dinner! So maybe your baby is actually waiting for it to happen in an embarrassing location or something?
My roommates and I have been on a quest to come up with a list of capitalist books (i.e. like socialist books, but the opposite). This has been difficult, so mostly it's been a conversation about why there are so many more pro-socialist/communist books than pro-capitalist books. Any ideas? Also, I agree that A Dual Inheritance is a more interesting The Interestings.
@jfruh I found one of those big cricket (like 3-4 inches long) guys in my drunken noodles at a thai restaurant once. I told them and they apologized profusely but didn't offer me a discount. I regretted not pushing harder for a free meal, but at the same time I know I would still feel like a douchebag doing that (I wouldn't if it were a chain or a large company though). Still went back a number of times. (It was good food and options were limited.)
Send this link/info to your landlord— $50 rebate and free pickup! http://www.coned.com/energyefficiency/residential_bounty_program.asp Also, "Residential Bounty Program" lolol
@laluchita Yeah! PubMed you guys! Anyone can access it and read the abstracts!