I shouldn’t have continued dating Jason once I found out he sold weed. I probably should have just called it quits when he angrily threw a small McDonald’s French fry at me because I didn’t read his mind and buy a burger. And, I definitely shouldn’t have loaned him $1,000 over the course of the few months we dated.
The problem is how to use the joint account. Just bills? Groceries? Do groceries include beer from the liquor store?
Spring is in the air, and as Alfred, Lord Tennyson famously said, it’s the time when a young man’s fancy lightly turns to thoughts of love. Truly, this is an optimistic moment: buds are bursting through frost, fans of lousy baseball teams feel improvident hope, and in all matters romantic, we cannot help but think of the good things yet to come—the spark of new attraction, the idyllic domesticity of a shared apartment, the stomach-flutteringly massive notion of getting married. So let me bring you down to earth: There's a good chance you're going to get divorced, by which time you may have kids, and on top of all the other heartbreaks, you may embark on a lifetime of difficult conversations about money. Let’s talk about this.
Scenario: You have an extra $5,000 in your bank account. You're up-to-date on all your bills, and you're on track for savings goals, so you get to choose where to put that $5,000. You'd like to pay off the $5,000 remaining balance on a loan and get it over with. Your spouse wants to use $2,000 of it to get something for the house. Who's right?
A Father-Daughter Duo Answers Your Questions: On a Parent-Child Relationship Based on Financial Support
So I guess what I'm wondering is this: How do I grow a financial backbone in the face of such generosity and how do I do this while maintaining a strong relationship with my father?
Things are not even in most respects, and I get that.
I was raised in a family where talking about money was not taboo. My father did a good job of raising two girls on a variety of incomes—money, was tight, and because of this, I was always aware of what we did and didn’t have.
Don't get divorced. It's an expensive, stressful process that makes an enemy out of the person you once chose above all others in front of your friends and family, people who, by the way, each spent $60-$300 on a wedding gift -- and, most likely, much more on clothes, babysitters, travel, and lodging -- to celebrate your deathless love.
Meaghan: Mike! I just read an excellent article on the Date Report that cites you as a couponing expert. Or um, quotes you about your couponing-while-dating philosophy.
Where and how did you live, Josh?