The Discomforting Compulsion of Making Comparisons in Your 30s

We have already made some of the decisions that are defining what kind of lives we can lead, and the sum of these choices is expressing itself again, now as adults, and in big ways.

When Do I Tell My Boss That I’m Applying to Other Jobs?

Job searching while you have a job is a tricky thing to navigate. While it doesn’t feel good to be dishonest with your coworkers, you also don’t want them to think you’ve checked out—especially if you end up being there a while! The sad and uncomfortable truth is that it’s quite normal to have a period of deception while you hunt for other jobs and fake doctors appointments while you interview.

Ask the Grindstone: Job Reference Etiquette

Hi! I have a question for your Grindstone series: The etiquette with references.

Working Through the Grunt Work

started a recent career group session sharing brief updates. One member (I’ll call her Cassie) had recently left a senior position at a large non-profit, and was now one week into a mid-level role at a small foundation.

How to Survive a Networking Event as an Introvert

The thing I dread most about work is attending events like trade shows, all-day business meetings, or ghastly “networking opportunities.”

‘Maybe You Have a Rich Husband?’

“We think you’re great and we’d love to offer you the job,” the woman on the phone told me. She trailed off momentarily before resuming again, “but we’re not sure there’s any way you can take it. But, we thought, ‘maybe she has a rich husband.'”

‘Don’t Eat My Oatmeal’: Working With Colleagues Who Don’t Like You

In many respects, the skills that we learn in school are not very good preparation for work. Success at work often doesn’t involve being obedient, following instructions, or even necessarily completing assignments on time (all the abilities that school achievement is built on). There is one way, though, in which being in school and being in the working world are quite similar: having to collaborate and work closely with different, sometimes non-compatible, personalities.

The Work Habit Rules I Aspire to Live By

I am a very self-motivated and occasionally anxious person, which means that at work I’m often in good shape in terms of my to-do list while simultaneously feeling quite worried about getting everything done. As I’ve gotten further into my career and taken on more responsibility, I’ve also worked longer hours, and have started to use more of my free time to think about work, to respond to emails in off hours, to delay outside interests, and to sacrifice good habits (like getting more exercise or making time for breakfast). This soothes the consistent feeling that I am somehow not doing enough.

Five Characteristics of Good Mentors

In Lean In, Sheryl Sandberg describes an encounter with a woman she works with: the women describes wanting a mentor that is willing to meet with her once a week for an hour to talk about her career. Sandberg responds: “No, that’s a therapist.”