In Salon, an essay by a self-described stay at home boyfriend: “Say what you will about modern times and gender roles in the 21st century, but there are still certain behaviors associated with manhood. Providing. Protecting. Being a stay-at-home boyfriend may look easy. But let’s say I’ve forsaken a certain amount of pride.”
I think it is totally fine to want to pay and to feel like you want to pay and say, I want to pay. But it’s not because you are a duuuuuuudddeeee, dude. And that’s what I have to say about gender roles.
Via Publisher’s Marketplace: “Jessica Walsh and Timothy Goodman’s 40 DAYS OF DATING: THE BOOK, based on the viral social experiment with 2 million unique visitors, a designed, expanded look at the experiment between two friends and the results, including texts, conversations, artwork, photographs, and details of the romance before, during, and after the experiment that never made it onto the site, to Deborah Aaronson at Abrams, in a pre-empt, for publication in Fall 2014, by CAA. Screen rights previously acquired by Warner Bros.”
It’s a classic story. Boy meets girl in college. Girl dislikes boy, but then asks to be friends five years later. Boy says no, but changes his mind mind after they both go through bad breakups. Girl and boy start falling for each other. Boy freaks out after they finally act on their sexual tension. Girl doesn’t want to see boy anymore. But then boy confesses his love, and they live happily ever after—with two nice incomes.
Marriage has changed, because women’s opportunities have changed. Women graduate more, they work more, and they earn more than they used to. These are all good things. But marriage has also changed, because people want new things from it. Men don’t want a homemaker, and women don’t want a provider. Men and women both want a partner, someone who can help with their emotional and financial needs. So they wait until they’ve settled into their careers to tie the knot, and they try to find someone who’s doing the same. This is also a good thing.
But the consequence of all these good things is more inequality.
For the Atlantic, Matthew O’Brien discusses a new paper from the National Bureau of Economic Research that shows “assortative mating” — partnering with people who are like you — is on the rise and has contributed to a 25% increase in income inequality. In the end, it is the fault of women, who keep going to college and wanting to marry for things they learned watching too many romantic comedies (love, etc.).