Some Costs Associated With a Relationship

• Two cups of coffee at a nondescript diner: $5

• Two tickets to a movie, followed by two scoops of ice cream: $30

• New dress shirt: $50

• Dinner at restaurant, well-reviewed in newspaper: $70

• A bouquet of flowers: $15

• Happy hour drinks: $26

• Groceries to host a Sunday brunch: $45

• Wine tasting: $60

• Tuxedo rental for a wedding as a “plus one” guest: $145

• Day trip to pick apples and go hiking: $36

• Two plane tickets to visit parents: $770

• Bottle of wine as a gift to parents: $60

• New book about the American Civil War, for father, a Civil War enthusiast: $28

• Cab ride from airport, split to make two stops: $45

• A copy of apartment keys: $12

• A box, bought on eBay, to put keys in: $20

• Groceries for dinner for two: $80

• A man with a van to move one set of apartment things into another apartment: $200, including tip

• New dishes: $60

• Grocery shopping for two: $110

• One half share for new couch: $450

• Two pints of Ben & Jerry’s to eat while sitting on said couch: 2 for $5 deal

• A Netflix streaming subscription split among two: $4

• A room divider, to provide each other with individual space: $100

• A night out alone, with friends: $60

• Another night out alone, with friends: $50

• Another night out alone, with friends: $30

• An inflatable mattress: $45

• Plane ticket for one to visit parents: $300

• The other half for the couch: $450

• Takeout delivery for one: $25

• Coffee for one at a nondescript diner: $2.50


B. Benson is an office drone.


17 Comments / Post A Comment

PicNic (#3,760)



So sad, so true.

rhinoceranita (#5,858)


honey cowl (#1,510)

Noooooo I was so full of hope and joy, then you crushed me!

moreadventurous (#4,956)

…and a happy monday to us all :(

(very pretty, very sad)

Meaghano (#529)

Never split the couch!

@Meaghano Yes! This was the lesson of King Solomon – the one who truly loves the couch would rather give it up than see it harmed.

Meaghano (#529)

@Josh Michtom@facebook Never split the baby! Or the 12 tribes of Israel? Unclear.

Lily Rowan (#70)

Aw, Bob! :(

Not great.

aeroaeroaero (#1,422)

I’m moved and sad like everyone else, but $12 seems like a lot for copying keys, no?

Lily Rowan (#70)

@aeroaeroaero If the front door is one of those DO NOT COPY keys, it costs a lot more. Also, I’ve had as many as four keys associated with an apartment.

Christy (#3,892)

@aeroaeroaero Try seven keys. My old apartment had two front door keys, two back door keys, a gate key, a basement door key, and a basement gate key. So yeah, it can be a lot.

coupdefoudre (#3,172)

What’s a “box, bought on eBay, to put keys in”? Totally not getting this one…

coastalelite (#2,528)

@coupdefoudre I was thinking maybe it was supposed to be kind of like a proposal…a “let’s move into together” proposal with keys instead of a ring?

elVollbrechto (#4,347)

@coupdefoudre I think it’s just a hide-a-key scenario.

elVollbrechto (#4,347)

Agh, as someone who recently poured a lot of time/energy/funds (gas, tolls, personal grooming) into a short-lived and ultimately ill-fated short-but-significant-distance relationship…yes. Just: yes. Thanks, Bob.

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