The Cost of Getting Knocked Up (So Far)


NECESSITIES:

Pregnancy test, most expensive one that was on the shelf because I figured now is not the time: $23
breakfast with best friend after stricken fiance goes to work, FREE, because, “Girl, you’re pregnant!” “Oh god.”
prenatal vitamins at drug store after breakfast “I guess this means I’m committing? Better get the smallest bottle…” $20
subsequent bottles of prenatal vitamins: $45
ALL OF THE TUMS: $10
pregnancy pillow, the aptly-named Mini-Snoogle: $32
three week supply of crackers for when I couldn’t get out of bed without eating crackers: ehh, $20?
relationships costs of lying in bed surrounded by humidifier, crackers, Tums, huge pillow, and growing fetus: untold

Subtotal: $150

 

MATERNITY CLOTHES:

Okay fine I definitely need a new bra and a new sports bra because wow: $44
And now my coat no longer zips up and it’s January, Maternity coat: $42 on sale Old Navy (really proud of this price)
a maternity shirt from The Gap that I wore every day so I bought another one in pink, $42 total
maternity leggings because Dustin is afraid waistband of regular leggings is “crowding my son”: $9 on sale
black pants, why did I buy these, they were on sale at Old Navy, $25
another bigger bra a few weeks later, because wow: $26
two new pairs of underwear since only 1/3rd of mine fit anymore: $16
maternity jeans, forcibly bought by my mom when she came to town (thanks mom!): FREE for me, $39 for mom.
three tank tops (one white, one black, one gray) to put under all my shirts that no longer cover my body: $45
more leggings: $12
five more pairs of underwear a month later, because it’s really soul-crushing to wear underwear that’s too small for you: $25
okay I gave in and bought a skirt from Storq, this new maternity store for fancy people, it is black and comfortable and I wear it every day now, but still feel kind of guilty: $65

SUBTOTAL: $300
Devastating.

 

SO MANY BOOKS

The Birth Partner by Penny Simkin, so great! Gift from my nurse cousin. FREE
Ina May’s Guide to Childbirth (the best/worst/best)$12
The Expectant Father (aww / kinda dumb book) $15
What to Expect When You’re Expecting (had to) $15
Expecting Better $26.95 (hardcover! worth it)
From the Hips $22.99 (totally into it, even the dated graphics)
Operating Instructions, Annie Lamott, FREE with a giftcard from my birth partner’s mom (some very real shit in here, worth reading)
The Baby Book, Dr. Sear’s, FREE from a friend, though I’m sure I will pay the price emotionally

Subtotal: $91.94

 

CLASSES:

class at the birthing center you’re required to take to give birth there, $40 each, $80
4-week childbirth class: $395 for both of us, which is ridiculous but we’re still doing it
prenatal yoga: $18/class, um I’ve tried to go twice a week the past couple of months but you know how that goes. So maybe $250? Oof.
Hypnobabies home-study course, which is insane but let’s do this: FREE, hand-me-down from a friend (would be $150!)
cloth-diapering class (jury’s out) and then a “babywearing” class because why not just do it all in one morning: $20

Subtotal: $745 OH GOD

 

HEALTHCARE:

DISCLAIMER: results not typical (I hope!). I don’t qualify for Medicaid and didn’t have a job with benefits at the time, and my partner works at a company with fewer than 50 people so they are not required to offer benefits to dependents. The first few months I paid for prenatal care out of pocket, and from January on I’ll be paying a hefty insurance premium.

three monthly OBGYN visits in 2013: haven’t billed me yet but guessing $750
three ultrasounds in 2013, see above: $780, originally $1780 but when they learned I was paying out of pocket they knocked off $1K. I’ll take it.
bloodwork (and peework?) from a lab, out of pocket: $117
“platinum” level insurance premiums, sans discount: $515/mo for the premium, no co-pays for visits, $35 for ultrasound, no deductible. So far $1130 (birth will be a $500 (minimum)).

Subtotal: $2777 and counting

 

STUFF FOR THE BABY:

Oh yeah, that.

One four-pack of muslin swaddling blankets because Dustin was sick of “browsing” at baby stores and refused to come with me unless we actually bought something: $50

Subtotal: $50 We have a few months!

GRAND TOTAL: $4,113.94 ($1336 without the healthcare costs)

 

This is a little frightening knowing that I am still going to be pregnant for three more months and then there is a, um, NEW HUMAN to pay for, but as you can see by going through this, there are definitely ways we could have saved money. For starters, we could have checked out books from the library, gone to a sliding scale clinic for healthcare in 2013, not taken a $400 birthing class. These are all decisions we made with eyes open, though perhaps actively choosing not to add these costs up as went (yow), and with priorities consistently evaluated. I feel fine if not great about these costs, but don’t want to imply that any of it is necessary. Though the Tums, for me, were very, very necessary. And that damn Snoogle. BUY THE SNOOGLE!

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66 Comments / Post A Comment

LookUponMyWorks (#2,616)

Ah! Congratulations on your new li’l human!

Allison (#4,509)

Congratulations!

This reminds me of Erin Matson’s birth prices, where she’s collecting all the bills she’s received (sometimes months) after giving birth and seeing how much she/her insurance was charged. Babies: crazy expensive! Good thing they’re so cute. (The baby Gap Paddington collection is basically one giant punch in the ovaries)

Meaghano (#529)

@Allison Oh man I have to look that up. It is…insane. And yes when I saw that Paddington Bear thing I was like Oh no we are screwwwwwed. Been trying to convince myself that babies need raincoats ever since.

Allison (#4,509)

@Meaghano I don’t know where other than twitter she was posting about it (#birthprices I think? birthcosts?) but you could definitely ask. Or not if you don’t want to spend the next three months saying “meep”

squishycat (#3,000)

@Allison I fucking *work* at Gap, doing in-store visual stuff in Kids and Baby. Going to work is a punch in the ovaries, like, everyday. (PADDINGTON BEAR IS SO CUTE.)

Basically every woman I work with (except the one with an actual baby) has a fake “future baby stash” of shit that is so cute we would buy it if that weren’t creepy as fuck.

bgprincipessa (#699)

I saw you tweet a picture of what I presume was you a few days ago, about contributing to the patriarchy, and thought it was fantastic. But was also unclear whether that was YOU, so I’m glad to see it was and congratulations and holy shit this is a terrifying round-up!!

Meaghano (#529)

@bgprincipessa Haha YEP that was me. Terrifying is the correct word to use here — I mean this is just the MONEY part. But we’re excited! (I feel like I have to say that?) (But we are!)

boringbunny (#3,260)

Congrats! I thought this was a guest post. Did not know you had been pregnant this whole time.

CubeRootOfPi (#1,098)

Congratulations!

Wow, that doesn’t cover when the whippersnapper is born and growing.

AitchBee (#3,001)

OH GOD BABIES ARE SO EXPENSIVE [breathes into bag]

By which I obviously mean congratulations (SO EXPENSIVE)

ATF (#4,229)

Yes but once you have it, things should get cheaper because baby cages! Just stick it in one once you have it and things should be great. For reference: jezebel.com/5988400/putting-your-baby-in-a-cage-used-to-be-perfectly-acceptable

;)

My son’s first favorite thing was the snoogle pillow. He was all over the house in that thing. Congrats on your new baby!

Meaghano (#529)

@xtinamartinson Awww. It has grown to be a symbol of the tyranny of pregnancy and sleeping on my side for me but maybe it will be redeemed when a baby sleeps on it.

andnowlights (#2,902)

There’s a personal finance blogger who has added up all the costs for his kid so far and the kid is 2ish now? It’s a really fascinating post and I wish I could remember which blogger it was. Might give you an idea of what to expect! I’ll have to look this weekend.

Meaghano (#529)

@andnowlights Ooh yeah if you find it lemme know (though I am kinda afraid to know!)

theballgirl (#1,546)

Congratulations!! Being a parent rules! Although you’re probably aware, actual L&D costs vary widely: I was on my husbands relatively pricey insurance (Cigna) and the out of pocket was $3,500 for our sons birth. However, most of my mom-friends were closer to the $1k range (Blue Cross Blue Shield). None of these represent csections however, which do account for about 30% of births (and are unfortunately higher $$$)

oh and my insurance was charged around $60k, if I am remembering correctly.. which I am probably not because when you have a baby it also eats part of your brain.

Meaghano (#529)

@theballgirl Yeeeah, I looked up all the maternity specific co-pays when I was buying insurance but am assuming the $500 copay for the hospital stay will be the least of it. $60k. Jesus. I believe it. When my OB just turns on the ultrasound machine in her office for 20 seconds to look for a heartbeat she bills insurance $500.

theballgirl (#1,546)

@Meaghano Yup my insurance paid around $600 for my ultrasounds! The good thing is that Well Child visits (baby will have 45,989 of them), are covered under the ACA! And I will say that, outside the actual birth, these first 1.5 years were significantly less cost than I expected. So there’s that!! Yay? And the whole mini human thing :]

RocketSurgeon (#747)

Congratulations!

WriteBikeBobbi (#3,938)

Congrats on the kiddo! Ours is still cooking (23 weeks), and the most economical thing I’ve found to do re: accumulating baby stuff is to get it USED. Craigslist, or, if you’re lucky, a local community Mommy Selling/Trading Facebook thing like we have in our town. I’ve bought the kid pretty much all the clothing he’ll need for his first year of life, along with bassinet, toys, bouncy swing/seat/whatever, from other people. Does this make me a bad mom, though he’s not even out of the womb yet? Hells no! He’ll thank me when he sees he has a college fund. I’m going to try to breastfeed, because formula? Ooooh, it’s expensive. Just hope the boy, and the boobs, cooperate.

Meaghano (#529)

@WriteBikeBobbi Thanks, you too! I am 25 weeks tomorrow so we are in a similar boat. And yes! I have already been scouting Craigslist — no way do I want to spend a fortune on all that gear he may end up hating. We are in a big studio apartment and staying here for the first 6 months, hoping to get as little as possible but that is probably delusional :)

Lydiafizz (#5,943)

Congratulations! The Snoogle was sooo key for me. This is important- don’t buy into that “you need a breastfeeding pillow” junk. Just double the Snoogle into a C shape and use that. I’m leaning back on mine right now while a 7 month old snoozes on my chest.

We did a cloth diapering class too, and I spent so much time and money finding the best deals on cloth diapers- including “lightly used” ones. Never used them. At first I was too stressed out to deal with it, and then when we did try they leaked and we were already dealing with enough laundry and cleanup of baby fluids, and I was just like, forget it. And you know what? Diapers are not nearly as expensive as they say. I try not to think about landfills.

Someone gave me a copy of the La Leche League book “The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding” and it was pretty great. Recommended. Very laid back approach to parenting.

Meaghano (#529)

@Lydiafizz Oh, my friend recommended that LLL book. That’s good to hear, I need to get it. I hope it works out for me.

Yeah we can’t decide about cloth. We really want to do it (in THEORY) but have no washer and dryer soooo I just…can’t imagine dealing with the insanity of a new baby and that. We might do a ‘diaper service’ if we decide we really wanna go for it — it’s so expensive, though. And yeah the thing that gives me pause is that we would have to buy all the stuff up front and then just hope it works for us. But if we start w. disposables we could always decide we wanna go for cloth later. WHO KNOWS.

lemonadefish (#3,296)

@Meaghano I know around here no daycare will take a cloth-diapered baby. Don’t know what you plan to do re: childcare, but it’s something to investigate…

shannowhamo (#845)

@Lydiafizz I don’t think I’ve ever heard of La Leche League described as “laid back”. I haven’t read the book so maybe it IS chill but the people I’ve known who are LLL folks are intense and a little shamey. I think I’d want to read something with a little less of an agenda (especially if for some reason breatfeeding doesn’t work for me.)

leblancly (#5,970)

@Meaghano Would you be able to have one of those little mini washers? Like this kind http://www.amazon.com/The-Laundry-Alternative-Wonderwash/dp/B002C8HR9A/ref=pd_sim_la_4 I live in a building with a lot of parents in Brooklyn and I heard someone mention that this was a solution + a drying rack, not for diapers I don’t think, but just for the incredibly frequent amounts of baby laundry that one must do.
Also, Congrats!

Lydiafizz (#5,943)

Also, these healthcare costs make me extra grateful I’m Canadian!

Crystal (#5,944)

Congrats! However, I’d suggest a different title – this is the cost of BEING knocked up. The cost of GETTING knocked up sounds like it was zero. I was expecting a different article. (My cost of getting knocked up was non-zero due to infertility.)

Meaghano (#529)

@Crystal Ooh, thank you and good point! Whoops. The post you thought it would be would probably be more interesting.

cryptolect (#1,135)

Congratulations! I was thinking about pitching you guys a piece on my (uncomplicated) pregnancy costs, but then the baby took up basically all of my free time and mental acuity. It was… about $10 grand, due to a $4,000 yearly deductible and some genetic testing of dubious necessity. I don’t mean to freak you out, but this stuff is really expensive.

If you live in the NYC area (I think you do?) I have some baby clothes you might be interested in!

Meaghano (#529)

@cryptolect Oof yeah this is my first time adding it up and I have a feeling it won’t be slowing down any time soon. And yep, I’m in Brooklyn. We need to do a meet up!

catfoodhairnets (#5,955)

@cryptolect @meaghano Haha. I pitched Mike a piece last year maybe on this very subject. It is so tough to budget for and noone can tell you what it will cost. All I kept getting was “It depends.” Mine ended up being <$500 all in. Amazing. For a c-section. I am in NYC too — billfold parents meetup sounds cool. I haven’t forgotten that baby stuff is mostly tedious to non-parents.

meatcute (#1,430)

Congratulations! My little fellow is seven months old, and yes, they’re pricey! (Still paying off that $5,000 deductible… and probably will be until he’s 2. :((( )

Here’s the good news: They really don’t need much in the first few months. A few outfits (you’ll be doing laundry a ton anyways, so you don’t need THAT many options). Swaddling cloths. So many burp cloths. SO MANY BURP CLOTHS. A good carrier.

Some advice: Don’t buy any baby stuff now, at all. Chances are, you’ll get so much from friends and family. A lot of what you might feel compelled to buy now you’ll later realize you don’t need, or never use. Whatever you do, don’t buy any clothes. Those you’ll DEFINITELY get. Find a good used clothing or consignment store for later on, when the tiny adorable newborn clothes no longer fit. If you’re trying to get a sense of what you DO need, I really recommend Lucie’s List.

And if you’re on the fence about cloth diapers… go in with an open mind. I love love love not having to buy disposables. We got kind of obsessed with our cloth diapers when we realized how much more effective they were at catching that runny newborn poop — seriously only ever had blowouts in disposables. You can get some pretty affordable set-ups (I did prefolds and Thirsties covers), and a lot of cloth diapers have great resale values. I buy disposables occasionally for convenience, vacations, etc., and every time I lay down $10 or $20 for something that goes in the trash, I cringe. But I do have a washing machine, and depending on your NYC set up, that could be a deal breaker.

You’re in for such an adventure! The best possible kind. Good luck these last few months!

Meaghano (#529)

@meatcute Aw, thanks. And yes, ha, I feel like our baby already has a full wardrobe and he is not even going to be born for 4 months. I have yet to buy a onesie. My plan has been to put everything we need on our registry, see what we get at a baby shower and so on, and then go from there. We are going to be in our same studio-ish apartment the first 6 months (it’s a railroad that is all pretty open and no rooms with doors) so god help us I don’t want to be overcome with baby gear that isn’t essential.

Yeah we don’t have and aren’t allowed to have a washer and dryer :( We really want to do cloth, am leaning towards either just biting the cost of a diaper service in the early months or doing disposables in newborn stage then when/if we move somewhere with a W/D making the transition. It’s so hard to know how we’ll feel and what it will really be like! But the cloth diapers are so CUTE. Haha.

shannowhamo (#845)

@meatcute I have friends who like these gdiapers that are cloth (therefor cute) but have these disposable inserts. Sort of an interesting compromise.

meatcute (#1,430)

@Meaghano Definitely go for a diaper service if you have access and can swing it! (We live in the sticks, in the grayest state in the country; so old people + low population density means, no diaper service here. I was bummed.)

Another option that a few friends of mine have done is disposables for the first few months — while baby is growing like a weed — and then settling in to cloth three or four months later. There are some great services out there where you can essentially “rent” a package of cloth diapers (I think Jillian’s Drawers had one, but I bet you could find something local in NYC) to see which kinds you prefer. I highly, highly recommend prefolds and covers, though, just for ease of care, cheapness, etc.

sea ermine (#122)

@Meaghano I don’t know where you live but my cousins live in Queens and they did the diaper service and said it was the same price as disposables pretty much. Apparently it sometimes ends up being cheaper because you get potty trained faster (I guess because you can feel it more?). I dno’t know all the details but I would poke around online and compare prices.

WayDownSouth (#3,431)

Congratulations to both of you. Children can be quite expensive, but they’re worth every cent. Very good news.

Adouble (#4,640)

This is a good example of posts by Meaghan that I find less effective than what Mike and Logan write. The core of this site, to me, was there were two people with very clear fiscal identities: one is a bit screwed up and trying to do better, the other is on-the-ball to a shocking degree. Both of them write very honestly about their backgrounds and where they are right now. I have no idea about Meaghan. I thought she was like some struggling freelancer, but then she’s got all these stock options (maybe from tumblr if a commenter can be believed). But she’s worried enough about finances that $300 of maternity clothing is “devastating”? I really have no context for what she writes, and that’s such a sharp contrast to the other editors.

boringbunny (#3,260)

@Adouble This is very observant. I feel that I know Logan’s credit card debt to the cent yet I didn’t know Meaghan was pregnant, let alone five months pregnant (not saying she has to expose herself to the same detail but being pregnant is such a big deal in someone’s life, it seems jarring that this hasn’t been mentioned before). Meaghan’s next post could be about her allowance as the Queen of Spain for all I can tell. Maybe mystery is the game here – but it’s definitely different than the transparent Mike/Logan situation.

EDaily (#4,396)

I think pregnancy is such a deeply personal thing and I don’t blame her for maintaining her privacy until now. I have known women who’ve gotten pregnant and then lost their babies just a few weeks in or a few months in due to complications. Some women want to be sure before they say anything. Perhaps she wanted to wait until the right moment until announcing such a deeply personal thing to a bunch of strangers on the internet?

madrassoup (#929)

@EDaily : I knew someone would post this type of comment. But boringbunny literally said “not that she has to expose herself…” which basically means that you two are in agreement. I just think boringbunny’s point was akin to adouble’s, which is that in so many ways Meaghan is a mystery. Obviously the stock options example is better than the pregnancy one, but overall the point stands that where Mike and Logan are open books as far as their financial pasts and presents are, Meaghan continues to surprise us. Which in turn makes it hard to “get” her in terms of her function on this site.

I think it’s possible to move beyond the Odd Couple pairing that Mike and Logan set up in founding this site. For example, I can imagine a writer coming on board having made a significant amount of money in another context and openly wondering about what that means in terms of next steps. What does financial planning mean for someone like that? What counts as an indulgence? What counts as cheap? Of course that’s not an entirely relatable premise, but we read posts all the time on this site by rich people who don’t feel rich, and can still get something out of it. The key is that the subject positioning is always clear in those cases. In Meaghan’s, it’s unclear from day-to-day.

For instance, in another post (about going to the dentist), she mentioned forking over her credit card for nearly $1000 in (separate) bills. I think if Logan were to have written that, she would have said something about it adding to her already steep debt. And if Mike were to have written it, he’d probably share his plan to dip into savings to pay it off (though he probably would have used his debit card in the first place). With Meaghan, we don’t know what it means to her to put $1000 on a credit card. Where does she fit on the Mike-Logan spectrum? It’s not weird to wonder that.

In other words, I don’t see anyone here chiding Meaghan for not telling us when exactly she conceived her baby, when exactly the stick turned whatever color, how much she weighs, or anything like that. So there’s no reason to respond as though anyone has.

WayDownSouth (#3,431)

@Adouble when my wife was pregnant the first time, we were so excited that we told quite a few people almost immediately. When the miscarriage happened, it was devastating. Because so many people knew about the pregnancy, we had to repeatedly discuss the miscarriage, which was terribly upsetting. When my wife became pregnant the next time, we didn’t tell anyone for quite some time. I very much hope that Meaghan hasn’t experienced the trauma of a miscarriage and certainly understand why she wouldn’t discuss her pregnancy with internet strangers until the likelihood of a successful delivery is very strong.

madrassoup (#929)

@WayDownSouth I’m sorry to hear about what you and your wife went through. But literally no one has wondered why Meaghan waited to tell the internet she was pregnant. What adouble asked was how to reconcile someone having Tumblr stock with being devastated by a $300 maternity purchase. Not that they are irreconcilable notions, but it requires work on the reader’s part that is not normally asked on this site, because there is usually so much transparency about relationships to money, past and present. Let’s not turn this thread into an unnecessary defense of a woman’s right to reproductive privacy.

Adouble (#4,640)

@WayDownSouth I understand what you’re saying, which is why I never said anything about wishing she disclosed her pregnancy earlier. I’m about the least interested person in the world of who is pregnant. My point is that I would appreciate Meaghan’s Billfold work more if I knew what is her specific interest in writing about money. I get she likes writing, but that’s it. Mike and Logan have been really effortless in presenting their positioning in the economy of the micro level, and how it drives their interest on the macro scale.

ellabella (#1,480)

@Adouble This may help give Meghan context: http://thebillfold.com/2013/10/first-day-of-school/

Meaghano (#529)

@ellabella Thanks! Yes that first post outlines where I’m coming from but you guys are right that I don’t have as clearly defined of a POV as Mike & Logan do. Part of that is that this is their site and I write for the Billfold part-time so there just isn’t as much of me or as much about my life. But part of that is that I am somewhere in the middle, and/or have more ambivalence about my own situation and evolving thoughts about it. That might be what you are reacting to, which is fair and I get!

As far as the “devastating” comment — ‘devastating’ is a hyperbole but I meant, “Ouch, I did not intend to spend $300 on clothes I’ll only wear for a few months, even if I can technically afford it.’ I debated writing a bit about my feelings on that but decided against it.

$1000 on a credit card — for me, like the maternity clothes, ultimately fine and I can dip into savings to pay it off but I would rather not spend more than I’ve budgeted myself & what I make writing here part time (which as it turns out, has added up to be about what this pregnancy has cost me so far).

I don’t mean to be a mystery at all! I’m still figuring out what people care to hear about, balanced with, sure, what I am willing to talk about and what I want to write about. In general — babies aside, I guess! — I am a pretty open book and haven’t meant to pull one over on anyone!

WayDownSouth (#3,431)

@madrassoup yes, I appreciate the point made by you and others. We’re in broad agreement that Meaghan didn’t have any obligation to disclose her pregnancy to this site’s readers. You’re right.

I’m not that fussed about Meaghan not discussing her share holdings in detail, but that may be a result of differences in ages. When I was in university, someone having $45k in shares (which I what I think is roughly the value of Meaghan’s Tumbler shares) was wealthy. From my perspective now, a $45k share holding in a particular company is nice, but certainly not life-altering. I wouldn’t think it’s particularly relevant to a person’s financial viewpoint, but my 22-year-old self would disagree quite strongly.

I think one of the benefits that Meaghan brings to the site is her unpredictability. MIke’s posts are about ensuring that he spends less than he makes (which I agree with). Logan’s posts are similar to the adventures my eight-year-old daughter would have if I gave her a credit card (obviously Logan being quite more mature than my daughter). Meaghan’s posts sometimes include a broadening of her financial perspective (e.g., meeting with a friend’s father to learn some finance basics). I enjoy reading her posts to see what she’s going to learn about next. In short, Meaghan is a work in progress, while Mike and Logan have already established their financial behaviour.

WayDownSouth (#3,431)

@Adouble yes, what you said makes perfect sense. I know understand more fully what you said in your original post. Thanks.

boringbunny (#3,260)

@EDaily I don’t think anyone should be expected to make their pregnancy or credit card details (or anything) known to anyone. When I was writing the comment I thought about when I was keeping someone’s pregnancy a secret and at about 5 months she was telling people because she was so obviously pregnant- there was no point in concealing it. So I was just commenting on the dichotomy that whereas Logan is disclosing really personal financial stuff that random strangers would never know, random strangers might know Meaghan was pregnant. And it’s fine if Meaghan never said anything personal at all – obviously her prerogative – but she’s a complete mystery. And that’s totally fine. (I feel like I should say this a million more times. Whatever she does is completely fine.)

And I think the confusion came from that intro post – Meaghan said she was more Logan but she has stock options and a fiance. That’s surprising – is all.

I very much appreciate madrassoup sticking up for me. =D Sometimes I feel like my comments need to be written with disclaimers because people often jump to any and every potentially offensive meaning. (And that’s totally fine too). I will be extra careful in the future.

EDaily (#4,396)

@boringbunny I said what I said because of this line in your comment “but being pregnant is such a big deal in someone’s life, it seems jarring that this hasn’t been mentioned before” but now that you’ve clarified, it’s appreciated.

EDaily (#4,396)

@Meaghano I know you only started writing here a few months ago and I’ve appreciated your writing thus far. I’m looking forward to seeing more!

melo (#3,369)

@WayDownSouth $45k? Wasn’t Meaghan was one of Tumblr’s first 30 employees, meaning her payday was about $3.6 million?

shannowhamo (#845)

@WayDownSouth I totally agree that it’s weird that she’s a staff writer but vague about her finances. She should be upfront but it seems like she wants to be sympathetic (clothes are so expensive guys!) and that she’s a Logan but it sounds like she might be much better off than that. And why would she get pregnant without insurance! There, I said it, I’m a terrible person. But I do not understand adults going through the world without at least the lowest Bronze level plan in case of surprises (like accidents and babies!)

Mike Dang (#2)

@shannowhamo I just wanted to step in here and say—because I think some of these comments are a little unfair to Meaghan—that it’s sort of a privilege that the editors and contributors here allow anyone to know about our private financial lives, information that we have attached to our real names. Meaghan is free to disclose as much or as little as she chooses, and I think she provided a good overview in her introduction post, including disclosing that she has money from her stock options. I also think the comment about the health insurance is kind of harsh.

shannowhamo (#845)

@Mike Dang I have the utmost respect for you, Mike Dang! So I am sorry it came off as harsh but she did open herself up for comment (as anyone who writes about themselves online does) and it seems especially noteworthy on a site that is about money to point out that it’s irresponsible financially to get pregnant without insurance. If there was a reason for them doing it that way it would have been worth explaining if she didn’t want people to comment that this was an odd financial choice. I have a co-worker who thought she was physically incapable of getting pregnant but then surprise! she got pregnant so maybe it was a situation like that and if she chooses not to share that kind of info, of course that’s fine. If she can afford to do things out of pocket then that’s great!

@fo (#839)

@shannowhamo

“it seems especially noteworthy on a site that is about money to point out that it’s irresponsible financially to get pregnant without insurance.”

While I agree with Mike about the most of it, THIS is a big frickin point. Seems like a great jumping off point for that to be a post, or a series of posts–how/why health insurance can save your (financial) bacon, even when youre young and healthy.

@fo (#839)

@melo “$45k? Wasn’t Meaghan was one of Tumblr’s first 30 employees, meaning her payday was []”

Not to further discuss numbers that Meaghan doesn’t want to, BUT… I think that those published numbers were for people working for Tumblr from their “first 10″ hire date through the time of the acquisition, not for people who may have been first 10/30, but who left 18 months *before* the sale to Yahoo.

Now, I’m sure it’s more than $45,000; the only sensible place 45k comes from is if that is the number of options (in yahoo) [further speculation typed and deleted, bc trying to be sorta polite]

@fo (#839)

@Meaghano

Oh, and one last thought on the thread–re: “I am a pretty open book and haven’t meant to pull one over on anyone!”–imo, you’re more than open enough, even in the context. In the meat space, what you’ve put out there would be on the verge of oversharing, but the internetz, and the Billfold, are places where oversharing can be seen as undersharing. Think you’ve been striking a good balance–keep it up!

Meaghano (#529)

@@fo Yeah I am of two minds about putting that number on the internet, but am totally comfortable contextualizing — Yes, I was one of the first 10 at Tumblr but only full-time for one year, 6 months contract so I vested 25% of my options (a topic that will be discussed in the second options post we’re publishing today!). When I quoted my boss saying I could buy a small studio apt in New York that was accurate and my attempt to contextualize. Not that I did buy a tiny apartment. Because then I would have to get a fancy job again to pay the co-op fees and the property taxes and all that. Also, I hate New York lately and don’t want to be here forever.

In short, I’m not a millionaire, but I do have a significant financial cushion that gives me great security and made having a baby feel doable and like a non-irresponsible choice. (I mean, if having a baby can ever really seem like a responsible choice…and not that anyone should really be judging other peoples’ decisions about having a baby but ANYWAY) It doesn’t mean I never have to worry about money again or that I never have to work again. Maybe I will write about this more in a post one day. I have many feelings about it, some of which I am still processing.

I still am pained by the idea of spending hundreds of dollars on maternity clothes I’ll only wear for a few months, though. I stand by that! Even if ‘devastating’ was a regrettable word choice and probably offensive if you thought I meant I was literally devastated by it — I get that. Whoops.

@fo (#839)

@Meaghano “I still am pained by the idea of spending hundreds of dollars on maternity clothes I’ll only wear for a few months”

I get pained ATM fees, so it’s just a thing. I was ‘pained’ that our second kid was a girl, so new clothes instead of recycling–not that the cost of new clothes has been a specific burden for us–but still *pained* when thinking (rare as it was) about it.

And word choice is so loaded and so personal at the same time–it’s like swearing, for some (me) it’s just ‘normal’, for others it’s really a *big deal* to curse. I don’t think of ‘devastating’ as really severe, in the context you used it at least, but I get (as you express) the reaction of others.

And, totally out of sync with this piece of the thread, but in response to another part: Diapers (nb: I’m the dad, which I thought I’d toss out there, given how flipping long my thoughts on diapers became): (1) in the first couple weeks, at least (I’d say 4-6, minimum), just suck up the ecological catastrophe that the disposable are, and use them–too often changing, too tired, too smelly; (2) get said disposable diapers delivered by Amazon to your door–sign up for Amazon Mom, put them on subscribe & save, and be happy about it; (3) when relying on Amazon, make sure to stay a bit ahead on the ordering, as they are sometimes out of stock, and you will sometimes use them faster than you think; (4) if/when using the cloth diapers, *just use a service*; yes, it’s a ‘decadent’, first world, rich person thing to do, but (a) it’s not *that* much compared to disposable, (b) you can afford it, without jeopardizing your family’s welfare, (c) your time is more valuable spent doing something else, (d) etc, etc., (e) do NOT let your subtle guilt about spending $$ prevent you from doing it–if you think that you would *enjoy* washing nappies, fine, but do it bc of that, not to save (less than) ~$50/week (note: disposables, from Amazon, will run over $10/wk, and over twice that from the local market, for at least a few months). Any way: congratulations an good luck.

ceereelyo (#3,552)

Congrats, congrats!! My husband and I are planning to start trying in a couple of months. We are constantly worried about money and I hope you do more articles about the costs of having a baby. Thanks for being candid in your spending and listing all your costs. I also endorse craigslist – my friend who has two kids makes a killing selling their stuff and getting stuff for them, especially that they are 5 and 3 and play with bigger toys/playsets. I think having your voice is a great addition to Mike and Logan’s backgrounds and is probably closer to what me and my husband experience (sans tumblr $ haha). Can’t wait for more baby posts!

I just googled what a snoogle and I want one now! It might be my perfect pillow.

lolapie (#5,967)

I’m on baby number 2 and have started getting all my maternity clothes on Thred Up (thredup.com). You wear them for so little time so they are practically brand new (and some even are.)

Meaghano (#529)

@lolapie Ooh I looked it up and am about to buy some shorts for $5! Amazing. Thank you! We’re going on our last pre-baby trip in a few weeks and since its February…but it’s Mexico…I may have cried trying to see if my shorts still somehow fit under the bump. Turns out the bump is not the only thing that has grown! Ha.

lolapie (#5,967)

@Meaghano Ohhh girl, I know. This second baby was a total surprise (shock?) and then I was like, “oh, ok cool. First baby came in April, this one is due in June…I can wear all my old maternity clothes…”

Nope.

Enter thredup! And it’s been awesome. I think I’ve spent about $100 and got a pretty good wardrobe to get me through. I just need to stop trying on my pre-baby clothes, because…ouch. Emotionally crushing. Like shaking your arm just to see it jiggle. Whyyyy?!

bananas! (#5,968)

Parent of a 2 year old here! Yes, they are SO EXPENSIVE. Especially in NYC. But I have found that I save tons of money on not going out to eat and not spending all of my money in all of the bars and not really ever having time to shop for clothes and such, so it kind of evens out? Not entirely, but I don’t feel nearly as broke all the time as I thought I would

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