When in Doubt, Go Dutch

In the study, 84% of male respondents and 58% of female ones self-reported that men still cover most of the dating expenses well beyond the first date (where the numbers are reportedly even higher), though 75% of men and 83% of women report commonly sharing some dating expenses by the six month mark. Around 57% of women in the study report that they pull out their wallets early in dating to split a bill, but 39% of those women wanted to be told to put their wallets away, and 44% of all the women in the study were “bothered” that men expected them to pay at all.

Interestingly, 64% of male respondents say they believe that women should contribute financially to a relationship, and 44% would end a relationship with a woman who never offered to pay, but 76% of men felt guilty when the women did pay.

When it comes to dating, who pays? According to the Guardian, a study using 17,000 unmarried heterosexual women and men showed that the line of thinking still leans toward men paying for dates (see: this disastrous date we posted last week).

The Guardian story points to broke millennials for the reason why the idea of men paying for dates is still so prevalent. If incomes are stagnant, the job market is still rough, and more young people are moving back in with their parents, writes the Guardian, “Is it any wonder that, from a strictly financial perspective, some women prefer to be taken out to dinner rather than to join someone for it? Or that the men for whom earning money is a struggle prefer (but feel guilty about) a woman who participates in the traditional financial transactions (dinner, drinks, movies, etc.) that still underpin the modern dating environment?”

Is going dutch the way? Do you offer to go dutch, but secretly hope your date pays? Dating, it is complicated.

Photo: Kevin Dooley

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