Step Down From That Money Panic Ledge It’s Going to Be Okay Probably

Talking about my debt and having a plan to pay it off has helped me be a lot cooler about it. The frequency of STRESS ATTACKS during which I suddenly remember HOW MUCH MONEY I OWE AND HOW I’M NEVER GOING TO PAY IT BACK have really gone down. I’m just a human, with a large amount of debt, NBD. No one owns me I own me, and I have 1 plan. Cool. Chill. Namaste. I rarely panic about my credit card debt anymore. But I do still have moments when I’m in bed and my entire body seizes and my stomach drops because I remember about TAXES. Ways 2 deal:

• Immediately think of literally anything else

• World annhiliation still a real possibility in this lifetime

• Maybe next wave of Republicans will be so anti-taxes that they’ll cancel all taxes owed by anyone ever?

• Or maybe there will be a coup or bloodless revolution and THEY’LL push the reset button

• It’s not like I’m adding to my tax burden with every dollar I make!!!!!!!1

• Everything will be fine

• All things workout

• Maybe one day I’ll meet a perfect tax person and she’ll be like, I’ll help you, just give me access to all of your things and I’ll take care of all of it, you deserve this kindness

• Lottery

• Friend will get rich, pay off government for me

• Could have sick startup idea, suddenly develop follow-through, become my own rich friend

• Maybe I’ll be the witness of a crime? And I can negotiate to testify BUT ONLY if my tax debt is erased? All the government people know each other right that’s how it works? (“I won’t talk to anybody but the DA…and also a mid-level IRS employee”)

• I’ll just be paying it off forever, that’s fine, it’s fine, that is the plight of my people (my people being those of us who didn’t figure out not to do this to ourselves until it’s A Little Bit Late)

• At least there are not debtor’s prisons!!

• Space. Think of space. SPACE. We are specks. The IRS is less than a speck. SPACEEEEEEE.


7 Comments / Post A Comment

honey cowl (#1,510)


Bill Fostex (#573)

.N ҉ A ҉ M ҉ A ҉ S ҉ T ҉ E.

bgprincipessa (#699)

@Bill Fostex 87% convinced my computer was broken.

LOGAN how is the government going to pay for Space if you don’t give the IRS all your money? HOW I ASK

WayDownSouth (#3,431)

If Logan is an employee, shouldn’t her employer withhold taxes from her paycheque? Here in Australia, contractors and self-employed people have to make quarterly tax withholding payments. Is there a similar system in the US?

suzabellajones (#2,929)

@WayDownSouth Yes, that’s exactly how it works here too. It’s just difficult to part with the big chunk of money every quarter. I assume that’s what Logan’s going through, unless she also owes from a previous tax bill and is paying that off in installments.

katiekate (#1,051)

@suzabellajones So, i work two daycare jobs and make less than $19k a year. I found out a week before taxes were due that neither of my employers were taking taxes out of my paycheck. I owed $350. I had a three day long panic attack, basically, and now that I’m taking taxes out of one jobs paychecks, I’m making $200 less a month. This is terrifying when you are making so little money as it is. I can see why someone would avoid that (I’m very tempted to do the same thing next year but, I’m trying to be Responsible). I’m guessing that’s what Logan is going through, in a way, here.

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