My Last Hundred Bucks: Tampons, Library Fines, and Fun.

Where’d your last hundo go, Jen Glantz?

$22.75: Tampax Pearl Tampons (2 boxes). I’m not one for brand names, really. Most of my clothes are either off the bed-bug infested racks of Goodwill or the bargain bins at Wal-Mart. But, when it comes to plugging that time of month, one really shouldn’t cheap out. Plastic always trumps cardboard, and for that, I’m willing to shell out the extra dolla’ bills.

$7.10: Library fines. Thanks a lot Joan Didion.

$50: Tickets to see Fun. In concert: I’d like to think “We are Young” is the love song of our generation. Plus, it’s been a while since I’ve stuffed my junk into a pair of skinny jeans and sweated bullets while shouting out catchy lyrics among loyal, tone-deaf, strangers.

$1: Pizza. It’s really 99 cents, but I have this bad habit of taking my first bite into the slice too soon after it’s out of the oven and so, the scorching hot cheese discharges out the sides of my paisley-shaped mouth and lands on their grainy counters. For that, I usually let them keep the change.

$7: Smoothie at Liquiteria. I like to binge drink my bee pollen.

$6.25: A half-pound of black & white cookies. If you prefer the chocolate half, we should probably date.

$4: Laundry. I’m a sucker for a clean pair of undies and after much debate, I’ve come to accept it’s cheaper to do a load of wash than to go out and buy new ones.

$1.90: A breakdancing homeless dog. This one certainly doesn’t warrant an explanation, does it?

 

Jen Glantz lives off of NYC street pizza and exposes all of her love affairs here.

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8 Comments / Post A Comment

chic noir (#713)

Are you joking about Goodwill clothing being bed bug infested? I am terrified of bed bugs. I saw one blog post about putting thrifted clothes in the freezer for two weeks to kill bed bugs.

lizard (#2,615)

@chic noir you can normally see bed bugs. I shop at thrift stores all the time. just examine the clothes and clean them well before wearing.

selenana (#673)

Very good use of your last $100.

Renleigh (#2,110)

I prefer the chocolate half! But I am a straight lady. Can we still date?

sintaxis (#2,363)

@Renleigh Ooh, me too, but not a straight lady, so I think that means I get first dibs…?

Megano! (#124)

pffft OB are the far more superior way to plug your leaky vag

fake coffee snob (#2,227)

@Megano! This is really, really true.

shannowhamo (#845)

@Megano! I’m a Playtex Sport gal myself. I’ve tried to go no applicator (or Instead Softcup) but it ain’t my thing.

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