Schwarzfahren (Or: Exploits in Fare Evasion While Living in Berlin)

In the beginning, I told myself that it was financially irresponsible not to dodge the fare. It was just too easy. Berlin’s public transport system, a citywide labyrinth of trains, trams, buses and subways, is a thing of beautiful simplicity and structuring: A single ticket is valid for all modes, the network covers almost every conceivable destination, and the service is, of course, überpünktlich (very punctual). It is also barrierless, and spot checks by inspectors are relatively rare. As justification, I used the fact that I had, somewhat rashly, packed up a life of relative luxury in income-disparate South East Asia and landed in Berlin’s thoroughly competitive (read: desperate) job market with only a year’s teaching experience, little in the way of German and even less in the way of money. After mistakenly buying around four tickets too many on my first day, I vowed to make a better fist of getting around my new home city on the cheap. Several days later, having dutifully been stumping up the €6 each morning for a Tageskarte (day pass) and, having never even seen an inspector, let alone been checked, I took my first step into petty criminal territory: neglecting to validate my ticket.

At first, traveling illegally is electrifying; even the dullest journeys become thrilling, suspenseful, dangerous. My silliest boyhood spy fantasies come to life as I furtively glance up and down the train, scanning the myriad faces for any sign of an undercover agent (inspectors are usually plainclothes, adding texture to the fabric of my fantasy). The fact that I am doing my sneaking in the former Stasi stronghold of East Berlin only heightens my indulgence. After being told by a fellow broke hostelmate that BVG, Berlin’s transport authority, often uses retirees as inspectors, reportedly because they arouse so little suspicion, I spend a week irrationally frightened by the movements of Berlin’s aged population (whose numbers are plentiful). Following an incident where I become increasingly convinced that an elderly man, complete with backpack, which obviously is to carry and conceal his fining apparatus, is staring me down, waiting for me attempt to flee, only to find that in reality I am just partially obscuring his view of a map, I realize that I am probably taking it a bit too far. But I do not stop.

Eventually any remaining shred of excitement is stripped away, leaving behind only fear and paranoia. Large parts of my daily travel (and adrenaline) are now spent in a state of hypervigilance; other freeloaders tell me that I am exceptionally lucky not to have been caught yet. Despite this, I continue, beginning to reason that if/when I am caught, the €40 fine will pale in comparison to the savings I have already made. I am vaguely aware (but deliberately ignoring) that this kind of reasoning sounds a lot like that used by a gambling addict. And I have become addicted: to the thrill, then the feeling of defiance, and finally (and perhaps most importantly) the substantial savings it delivers to my back pocket. For traveling without a ticket is that perverse addictive habit that it actually pays to keep doing—the drug that keeps on giving. More and more, however, I feel like a thief; revelations that locals also engage in the practice do little to quell my unease. I begin to wonder: what else would I do if I knew that I could get away with it?

In expensive cities like Tokyo, London and New York, where you are more likely to really need the extra cash, there are no such opportunities for tests of moral fiber. A friend, whom in the privacy of my head I embarrassingly sneer at, says that she pays because her father’s friend is the CEO of a public transit system back home, and that to dodge the fare would seem like some kind of personal betrayal. Hooded in my arrogance of thinking that I am really taking part in a noble act of “defying the system”, of “wealth redistribution”, this immediately strikes me as absurd, as if a personal connection with public transport profits in general is enough to obey the concept in another hemisphere. Despite this, her reasoning, where actions play out as representations of personal connections to ideas, sounds dangerously like basic ethical reasoning, and only deepens my guilt. Still, my dwindling funds remain wedded to thoughts of cramped hostel beds, cheap but delicious beer, and JFK’s favorite jelly donuts.

Inevitably, it happens, and as my brain juggles guilt, fear and relief my body acts on its own, ambling down the carriage in a way I hope looks nonchalant. Thankfully, this is the Ring-bahn, the wondrous circular frame around which Berlin’s effortless transport system is based, meaning regular stops and fullish compartments. I calculate that the unlikely-looking inspector—skinheaded, wearing a stained silver tracksuit, looking more like evader than enforcer—only has time to check the first two sections of the carriage, and risk sitting down, mostly to mask my now uncontrollable hand-shaking. I carefully sit half-cocked, angled towards the nearest door, and look up. Across from me are two women, professional, one of whom meets my eyes and smirks, not unkindly. She knows what is up. Briefly I sense a fellow comrade, for the appearances of Berliners are nothing if not deceptive, but that feeling is dashed as her purse clasps part and a ticket emerges. I try to meet her gaze again but her eyes are past me now and I wonder: Is she willing him to catch me, or for me to be granted clemency?

Later that afternoon, having earlier made the stop, looking a little like a human version of the Spaghetti Monster as I simultaneously leapt out the carriage doors, fumbled for my ticket, lunged for the validation machine and dove back into the carriage, all while attempting to avoid suspicion, I take the U-bahn into town, to vote early at my embassy. Filling out my papers, knowing that postal votes are counted well after the result is usually determined, but still believing in the importance of my small action, I am struck by the hypocrisy of my actions. Feeling ashamed, rather than buoyed by notions of civic duty fulfilled, I descend underground ticketless and head back to the hostel, to search for invisible jobs.

Soon after, en route to an apartment viewing, my girlfriend stoops down suddenly at the tram stop, resurfacing with a white square of well-trampled cardboard. Frowning, she examines her find, and as her eyebrows rise back towards and then above their natural position, so do our fortunes. In her hand is a monthly pass, still valid for three more weeks. Suddenly the chilly November morning is a lot less harsh, and happy as I am, the thought of our crucial piece of luck is tempered by the misfortune it signifies for someone else. For the first time in weeks I step onto public transport guilt-free, towards what an evening phone call will make our home for the winter.

The next few days, I see a little more of the city, feeling a little like a corporate-sponsored VIP being given a free tour by a faceless benefactor. Evidently even in less desperate times my capacity for self-delusion is undiminished. But mostly I experience relief, as weeks of pent-up sighs wash over me and feelings of comfort fill up hollow pockets left behind by anxiety and guilt. It feels good to be legit, and yet I also feel a little squarer, less like a “real Berliner”, less in keeping with the city’s unspoken acceptance, even gentle encouragement of rule-breaking as long as it doesn’t hurt anyone else. I realize that part of the underlying logic of my actions was rooted in the absurd idea that in stealing from the city I had quickly come to love, I could somehow avail myself of its often-intimidating edginess that both allures and terrifies expats in equal measure. Somehow it had never crossed my mind that attempting to authenticate coolness via petty theft is precisely the kind of mindset that would prevent it from ever being attained.

Unfortunately, my wallet continues to fail to carry out its intended money-carrying function, but not for long. Soon after the ticket find, I am offered a job, albeit only part-time. Knowing that even when our godsent ticket of salvation runs out I will be able to afford a replacement (not that I will always utilize this ability, wanting again on occasion to “thrill myself”), I feel ashamed of how I have felt since. In a weak moment of hubris, I think back on my “brief dalliance with near-poverty” and immediately feel sick, as if those words should ever be so glibly and self-servingly combined in phrase. Shaking myself out of my conceit, I think of how fortunate I am if the last month of pasta-based gastronomy and skipping on train fares in a foreign country is as close as I get to doing it tough. In a city full of visible reminders of what it really means to struggle for food and warmth, this should have been far more obvious.

Following my narrow escape from my first inspector interaction, I begin to run into them much more often, fortunately always when in possession of a ticket. After five months, and hundreds of euros worth of free trips, I am still yet to pay for my crimes. However, that all changes on a brief trip to Prague, where, after entering the underground and finding that the ticket machine only accepts small change, we venture further into the station in search of somewhere to change my freshly acquired krona into smaller denominations. After inadvertently wandering into the ‘fare zone’, we are met by two somber-looking inspectors, and, despite being at least 500m away from an actual train and (for a change) possessing pure intentions of honest travel, we are each forced to pay an on-the-spot fine of the equivalent of 35 euros. We then see no further inspectors for the rest of our four-day trip. Is this what Karma feels like?

 

See also: Reviews of public transportation

Ryan Eyers is a writer from New Zealand living in Berlin. You can check out more of his work at ryaneyers.wordpress.com or follow him on Twitter at @ryan_eyers. Photo: metro centric

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25 Comments / Post A Comment

falconet (#1,675)

I used to dodge the inspectors while living in Heidelberg. It seemed too easy! Then I saw someone get busted and publicly humiliated (LOTS of terrifying yelling – you’d think he was an axe murderer), which was enough to make me cough up the measly 2.30 Euros thereafter.

SnarlFurillo (#2,538)

This is a pretty douchey article, man. You stole from a public service and then wrote 1700 words trying to justify it.

@SnarlFurillo The difference between American leftists and German leftists, summed up one comment.

MelNotMissy (#968)

“More and more, however, I feel like a thief.”

There’s a reason for that.

jfruh (#161)

Yeah, I know you’re being sarcastic, but you know that public transit is not run by profitable corporations, but by (financially troubled, in Berlin’s case!) public agencies, right?

On the other hand, when I lived in Berlin my gf got her pocket picked halfway through the month and just refused to buy a new monthly pass. Though she bought a new ticket promptly on the first every month before and after this, she felt very strongly that she had paid for the month and shouldn’t have to pay again. She did not get caught.

lizard (#2,615)

and then you whine about how public transportation isnt up to par

@lizard But Berlin public transit is great! The system works!

lizard (#2,615)

@stuffisthings but it wouldnt be if more people evaded fares

Wow, I am a lot more honest than I would have thought: I lived in Hamburg and Vienna– cities with similar, honor-system public transit systems– for nearly 5 years and I never traveled without a ticket. Nor on any of my travels as a tourist.

Well… OK. Fine. I got busted, sort of, twice while living in Hamburg. I had a valid ticket (the student Semester-Ticket), but both times I had left my wallet, with the pass at home. I got checked, and couldn’t produce it, or any ID, or pay. A ridiculous comedic exchange passed between me and the ticket inspectors: Show us your ticket! Aargh, it’s in my wallet and my wallet is at home. Show us ID! My ID is in my wallet… which is at home. You need to get off and buy a ticket! I can’t buy a ticket because my money is in my wallet, with my Semester-Ticket, WHICH IS AT HOME. Etc etc. Upon producing my valid Semester-Ticket the following day at the main offices, I paid a 5 DM fee and that was that.

(And, yes, DM = Deutsche Marks. I am old. This was a long time ago.)

questingbeast (#2,409)

‘As justification, I used the fact that I had, somewhat rashly, packed up a life of relative luxury in income-disparate South East Asia and landed in Berlin’s thoroughly competitive (read: desperate) job market with only a year’s teaching experience, little in the way of German and even less in the way of money.’
Well, I’m glad you said! Otherwise I might have judged you harshly. Steal away, you poor, beleaguered soul.

oiseau (#1,830)

The way the author frames his fare-evading as a quirky adventure in his endlessly interesting life of International Travel is really what bugs me about this piece. The actual fare evasion I don’t care too much about, whatever, not too much judgement from me. Writing an article that casts the fare evasion in this light does bother me.

@oiseau Why? Genuinely curious.

oiseau (#1,830)

@stuffisthings Stealing fares isn’t that big of a deal – if I was struggling to make ends meet and it was as easy as breaking the honor system, I’d probably do the same. The relative benefit I would get from it compared to the microscopic loss the government would suffer makes it worth it, to me. Obviously everyone shouldn’t do it but if I’m struggling to buy enough food or if it means the difference between making rent or not, I’d do it. (I obviously don’t know what this guy’s circumstances were, just speaking for myself)

Why does the International Travel aspect bother me? I don’t know, maybe if it were written better I’d enjoy his adventures vicariously but the way he’s written it is not much more than “my feelings as I skip the fare in edgy East Berlin”, which I don’t find that special or entertaining. It comes across douchily for some reason.

@oiseau The reason I asked is because the way the article was written kind of rubbed me the wrong way, but so did all the judgy comments.

I’ll admit, I do find it fascinating which countries have more “trusting” transit systems, and how people react to them. For instance, Paris has pretty aggressive turnstiles but I don’t think I’ve ever gone through one without somebody squeezing in behind me.

TARDIStime (#1,633)

@stuffisthings @oiseau “Why does the International Travel aspect bother me?”
I’m going to take a stab at answering that one – possible because he sounds like someone how has Lived Internationally? Remember the reaction on The Hairpin when this was mentioned in an Ask A Lady column?

loren smith (#2,300)

I freely admit to having used a fake transit pass in the past. I wasn’t going to pay for using a service where my life was threatened or I was assaulted on a weekly basis.

loggedin (#3,338)

@loren smith I agree completely! This article is being honest, not bragging about a ‘big overseas adventure’ ( @questingbeast ), but admitting that he has done something wrong and how he was dealing with it. Try telling us you’ve never made a mistake or done something you know is wrong!!

questingbeast (#2,409)

@loren smith ‘Admitting that he has done something wrong and how he was dealing with it’. But why is he doing that? It’s not like we caught him and want an explanation, this is the subject he’s decided would make an interesting article. I don’t give a shit if he wants to dodge the fare, I just found the ‘justification’ ridiculous, and he sounds ridiculous making it. Being ‘honest’ doesn’t automatically make it interesting.

Ryan (#3,333)

@questingbeast What I was trying to do with the article was show how I went through a range of justifications (I’m in a new country with no money, it’s exciting and risky, it makes me feel more like a real badass Berliner, I’ll pay for it all eventually with a fine etc) each that are as ridiculous as each other, before being able to admit that what I was doing was essentially theft. At the time I was really low on money, and employment prospects were really low, and it was a way of making each day a lot more affordable, but that doesn’t mean I get to dress it up as anything more than it is. I was trying to explore how when we get in desperate situations we sometimes tell ourselves weird things in order to temporarily assuage guilt that can seem justified at the time, but which with the benefit of hindsight seem stupid or dishonest.

SnarlFurillo (#2,538)

@Ryan The thing that bugs me about this is that you got yourself into this desperate situation by “somewhat rashly” moving to a foreign country where you didn’t speak the language and had no job prospects, but you wrote like that’s some unfortunate thing that just happened to you. And it’s only in hindsight that you realized you were stealing? Come on. Plenty of people who can’t afford transit ride their bikes or walk.

Ryan (#3,333)

@SnarlFurillo Of course, the decision to move to Berlin was one that I chose to make. It was partially based on being set up with some contacts that made it seem like it there was a really good chance of work, which then fell through, but all the same that was a risk that I took. I think the idea of just packing up and moving here without too much planning was very appealing to me, in a romantic adventure kind of way, and when it fell through (as things often do when you don’t adequately prepare for them) I did something I normally wouldn’t have done in order to stretch my money and stay for as long as possible to try and make it work. It wasn’t so much realising with hindsight that I was stealing but more recognising that it was dishonest I had pretended it was anything else.

Ryan (#3,333)

Didn’t mean to like my own comment, oops.

selenana (#673)

I definitely cheated transit a few times during my delinquent youth, but then I grew up and realized how valuable a functional tranpo system is, and how already heavily subsidized most of them are. I’m not above applying for any discount available, but I want to pay for services that are useful and good for the public.

Ellie (#62)

I was in Berlin for six weeks this summer, all my classmates got stopped multiple times and meanwhile I had never even seen a ticket inspection let alone been inspected. Finally in the last week of class I got ticket inspected. I was so sad! I always buy a ticket. This stems from studying abroad in Paris when on the first day of the month, my two friends hadn’t renewed their monthly pass while I had. We were riding the tram and got ticket inspected and they each got an, I think, 80 euro fine – maybe even more. My only infraction is that I once jumped a turnstile to the CTA (in heels!) because it was super late at night and I was skimpily dressed and alone, the card reader wouldn’t read my card and I could hear my train coming. Oh, also I once rode the trams in Zagreb for a week without a pass simply because I couldn’t figure out where or how to buy one (at many stations, you can’t). But after watching Kontroll, I’m terrified of ticket inspections. I do think riding for free on purpose is wrong. Also, Berlin public transit is the best ever.

Melli (#4,876)

I got caught in Berlin like a week ago. They were telling me, that if I’m not paying I’ll go directly to jail next time I wanna visit Germany again. This sounds horrible to me. Is that true? They got my US home address and I really don’t want to pay, because I feel like they didn’t understand why my ticket wasn’t valid or whatever. I actually didn’t understand that as well. It felt horrible! Should I pay? It’s a shitload of money to me.

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