Do You Live in a Meth Lab?

Moving into a meth lab can wreak havoc on your health and your finances. Just ask these folks! (They will answer, “Moving into a meth lab can wreak havoc on your health and your finances.”) Avoid this costly fate when buying a new house by checking your property for meth residue before you close. You can buy a kit online ($55), but you can save that $55 and know for free if you know what to look for.

SIGNS YOU MIGHT LIVE IN A METH LAB, courtesy The Utah Department of Health:
• “A large amount of cold tablet containers that list Ephedrine or Pseudoephedrine as ingredients.”

• “Jars containing clear liquid with a white or red colored solid on the bottom.”

• “Jars labeled as containing iodine or dark shiny metallic purple crystals inside of jars.” 

• “Jars labeled as containing Red Phosphorus or a fine dark red or purple powder.”

• “Coffee filters containing a white pasty substance, a dark red sludge, or small amounts of shiny white crystals.”

• “Bottles labeled as containing Sulfuric, Muriatic or Hydrochloric Acid.
Bottles or jars with rubber tubing attached.”

• “Glass cookware or frying pans containing a powdery residue.”

• “An unusually large number of cans of Camp Fuel, paint thinner, acetone, starter fluid, Lye, and drain cleaners containing Sulfuric Acid or bottles containing Muriatic Acid.”

• “Large amounts of lithium batteries, especially ones that have been stripped.”

• “Soft silver or gray metallic ribbon (in chunk form) stored in oil or Kerosene.”

• “Propane tanks with fittings that have turned blue.”

• “Occupants of residence going outside to smoke.”

• “Strong smell of urine, or unusual chemical smells like ether, ammonia or acetone.”

• You are cooking meth, in the place where you live.

 

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14 Comments / Post A Comment

KatNotCat (#766)

“They were about to schedule doctor visits when a neighbor shared the bad news: 2427 Radcliffe was a former meth house.”
Hey neighbors: please step up with that info before the money is on the table and the toddler is developing crippling mouth sores. Thanks!

Freddie Mac: Fuck you. Seriously.

nogreeneggs (#154)

@KatNotCat This was my first thought when I read the story too. Thanks for nothing neighbor! Poor family :(

KatNotCat (#766)

@nogreeneggs In retrospect, it’s very likely the neighbors believed that the family already knew or that Freddie Mac or the realtor had taken care of everything already. BUT NOW THAT WE ALL KNOW: Tell your neighbors all the dirt on their house, especially if that dirt is meth residue.

Megano! (#124)

But Jesse’s house was at one point a meth lab (for like a week) and he’s not sick/his ex gf’s kid isn’t sick!

cryptolect (#1,135)

@Megano!

Brock has more pressing dangers in his environment, though, right?

cmcm (#267)

My advice is to not move in anywhere containing bottles/jars of anything unidentifiable.

NoReally (#45)

@cmcm And even if you’re buying a house as-is, get it inspected.

@cmcm : “Hm, that is definitely a human ear in a jar.” “Well, at least it’s identifiable.”

Megano! (#124)

@Gef the Talking Mongoose Pretty sure this is what happened on Americna Horror Story last season, WITH DIRE CONSEQUENCES. So if it’s not meth it’s ghosts guys!

nogreeneggs (#154)

@Megano! Ghost/franken-animal-baby

nogreeneggs (#154)

My mom makes my dad go outside to smoke. IS IT BECAUSE SHE’S COOKING METH?!

@nogreeneggs I go outside to smoke too. AM I COOKING METH?

nogreeneggs (#154)

@stuffisthings Probably, do you also own lots of jars filled with things?

* Residence is available for rent because previous owners were arrested for cooking meth.

* There’s just tons of meth all over the place.

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