Things Not to Do As a Boss: Basic Rules Inspired by Marc Smirnoff

Marc Smirnoff was fired from his job as editor of The Oxford American., and today The New York Times reports what happened. We can glean a few things from the piece, but most importantly, here are some things not to do, if you are a boss:

1. “Call interns ‘baby.’”
2. “Explode in anger at a 19-year-old interns; insist they ride home alone with you, ask them to hold your hand and accompany you to your favorite ‘make-out spot.’”
3. “Make lewd comments.”  4. “Make unwanted sexual overtures” (While we’re at it: Make what you perceive as wanted sexual overtures. Your judgment sucks. Make no sexual overtures.)
5. “Hug, pat, kiss interns on top of head.”
6. Do anything you’ll ever feel compelled to describe to a New York Times reporter as “paternalistic and non-sexual.”
7. Do anything you’ll ever compelled to describe to a a New York Times reporter as in the spirit and manner of Ricky Gervais on The Office.
8. Try to get your job back by calling your bosses “insolent and manipulated.”
9. “Sprinkle your sentences with quotations from Shakespeare” (I mean, this is relatively harmless but no one has ever done this and not presented as an asshole, so just don’t).