The State of Things: Bugging Out, and Mr. Freeze
Mike: Logan, how has your week been going?
Logan: This whole week has been a total wash for me, Mike. I mean, there have been some high points, but I’ve basically just been in a haze of not doing work and spending money because I am obsessed with bed begs and they are all I can think about. Who can think of personal finances at a time like this? NOT ME.
Do I have bed bugs? Do I not have bed bugs? Is that chocolate sprinkle a bed bug? Is the polka dot on my pillow case a bed bug? I DON’T UNDERSTAND HOW NEW YORKERS LIVE THIS WAY.
Mike: Hey, we all have these sort of weeks. And I can totally cover for you. Let’s talk about this spending money business first. What are you spending money on?
Logan: Um spending money on just living man. Drinks. Bottles of water. Iced coffee. Bagels with cream cheese and tomato. I started off the week needing a new MetroCard which never bodes well.
Mike: Ah, I see. Hey, it’s a bunch of little things. At least you’re not dropping money on a bunch of clothes to make yourself feel better. Okay, so bed bugs. I feel like New Yorkers go crazy over them every summer. I’ve lived here for about seven years now and have never had to encounter them—knock on wood—but I certainly know people who have, and, yes, it can drive a person insane, but there’s only so much you can stress out about it.
I’m guessing the money associated with having to deal with bed bugs is stressing you out.
Logan: Well, yeah. So basically: My roommate confirmed that they are in her room, but she’s on the other side of the house. And I’ve been OBSESSIVELY SEARCHING for signs of them in my room but there is none. But I think we have to treat the whole damn place, or else they’re just leave her room and come to our rooms? I’m not sure. I can’t stop reading people’s bed bug stories. This shit takes over people’s LIVES. I haven’t spent any money yet, but whenever I start, it’s going to be like, $200 I think. On mattress covers and plastic bags and who knows what else.
Mostly I’ve just been buying a lot of ice cream. (To prepare.)
Also I’m feeling annoyed because I feel like this is a classic scenario. I start making more money (freelance), and then immediately something comes up that takes all that money. Also the ice cream is great for now but I’m like three cones away from having to join a gym, which I cannot afford/do not want to do.
Mike: Well, I totally get what sort of headspace you’re in right now because if there were any signs of bed bugs in my apartment, I’d freak out too. But the good things are that you actually haven’t found any evidence of bed bugs in your room yet, and that you’re taking care of it before you do. I remember my friend Karen telling me about a close friend of her’s who got bed bugs, and she dealt with it by getting rid of everything she owned, and immediately moving out of her apartment to a new building in Jersey. Now, when she gets home, she steps into a garbage bag by her front door, undresses completely, and then ties up the bag and puts it in a box to be sent out for cleaning. Then she runs into the shower because she fears she might be hosting them somewhere on her body. I mean, this woman does this every day! It’s insaaaane. Bed bugs can really drive a person crazy. I feel like you’re doing everything you need to be doing right now, and have remained relatively sane.
Logan: ENOUGH ABOUT ME! How are you????????????????
Mike: I’m doing okay! I’m currently of stressing out about weddings I have to attend, but I’m doing fine.
Logan: How many weddings? ONE THOUSAND WEDDINGS/four weddings and a funeral? The weddings are not in the city I’m guessing.
Mike: Well, I have two immediate ones coming up. One is upstate, and another one is in Texas. The one upstate is the one I’m currently stressing out about.
Logan: What are you stressing about? I will tell you the answer.
Mike: Well, it’s really just a bunch of money. I’m flying there, and then booking a hotel, and then renting a van with some friends to drive back down to the city, and I need to start considering the gift—and that’s just one of several more weddings I have coming up this year. This is what happens when you and all your friends are about to hit 30. All your friends decide to get married.
Logan: Jerks.
Mike: But I am happy for them, and will give up the money I’d spend on a vacation to be there for them. I can take a vacation next year.
Logan: Well maybe the wedding is your vacation! Road trip!
Mike: I’ll certainly have as much fun as I can.
Logan: What will you be doing to have fun this weekend?
Mike: I’m going to a “Batman party,” which I’m guessing is in preparation of the new Batman movie coming out next week. I’m going to dress up at Mr. Freeze.
Logan: Hahaah, whattttttttttt
Mike: Yeah, I’m not sure what’s going on, actually. The host works for a certain pop culture weekly, and needs to re-watch all the movies to prepare for next week’s coverage. So that’s happening! I’m guessing I’m spending around $50 for that? And then on Sunday I’m meeting a friend I haven’t seen in a while in Central Park, which will be awesome and free if it doesn’t rain. I might get a haircut too. How about you?
Logan: I have a friend in town from Portland. She said she’ll buy me drinks one night, which is awesome. And I guess I’m going to buy bed bug things, so that’ll be who knows—a zillion dollars. Brunch seems like it will be a thing that happens, because people like brunch. Maybe we’ll go to a museum (we won’t go to a museum).
Mike: Well, it sounds like you’ll have a lot to talk to us about next week! Godspeed, Logan. Don’t let the bed bugs bite.
Logan: fasjldfjlas;kdjfljalkfjsd Imma cut you for that. Itchyyyyyyyyyyyy.
Previously: The State of Things: It’s Hot and Meals Alone, Two Ways
When and how do you have these conversations? Email? Chat? (In person and you have your fancypants secretary take dictation?)
This weekend… I think I will probably order pizza for my friends I am hosting this evening ($25), Saturday I don’t anticipate spending anything, Sunday I might go grocery shopping and spend about $85. There is always the chance my partner and I might get the home-improvement bug over the weekend and go buy a few hundred dollars’ worth of blinds, too; that’s on the short-term projects list.
Oh, and I spent $800 on paying down my credit card today. If my other card bill comes in the mail today or tomorrow, I’ll pay $300 towards that. But that’s really paying off purchases I already made. I am looking forward to the monthly debt check-in.
Landlords will usually pay for bedbug killing stuff.
@The Dauphine But they generally won’t pay for dry-cleaning your entire wardrobe, giant plastic bags, mattress and box spring covers, doctor’s visits, etc. We had a scare a few years ago (that turned out to be some weird virus, thank god), and our landlord had a guy come over to inspect and spray/eliminate/whatever if needed, but that was it.
Meanwhile, I went to two really expensive dermatologists my boss recommended who both said, “Yep, these are bug bites,” one of whom gave me a “soothing” cream that made my skin WAY WORSE. But my roommate went to a clinic near our house, and they were like, “Oh, it’s this virus. It’ll go away on its own in a few weeks or you can take these steroids to clear it up now.” Glad I spent all that money on nothing!
@kellyography What kind of virus was it? I can’t find any bedbugs and I can’t pin down why I feel itchy. I’ve been to a doc and I have mattress covers
Yes to late-twenties wedding frenzy! I’m 29 and it is an extravaganza. Luckily celebrating friends with other friends at a big party while everyone looks fancy is pretty much the best.
I spent $30 on books today (Treasure Island!!, Hole In My Life, My Misspent Youth, Made for You and Me), so I’ll count that into my weekend spending. Beyond that I think I’m looking at a low-cost weekend, since my parents are in town and tend to foot the bill, but I’ll need to buy ingredients to make my dad’s birthday cake. I’d guess maybe somewhere around $60 total?
Found out today that the alterations for my bridesmaid dress will be about $100. So we spent all this time looking for “affordable” dresses online, dropped $100 each on that, and promptly got hit with like $60 in cross-border charges. So this dress is $260, is the colour of snot and fully acknowledged that no one will ever wear it again. Fun!
This weekend I’m going out to a friend’s cottage in the *LAURENTIANS* for the first time. So that will be about a $50 spend on food and alcohol and gas chip-ins but we’ll be far from any stores for two days. It should be great.
@raspberry cordial dude, that business with the bridesmaid dress suuuuuuuuuuucks.
Also, I spent a little time reading old credit card statements from like 2-3 years ago and holy cow, I am a moron. Like, 90% of the stuff that I buy is useless crap that I truly do not need. And I’m not even bad with money! It’s just like yeah, I’ll take those $200 leather boots and $100 scarf printed with freaking FARM ANIMALS and hold on, lemme just put $150 of fake Thanksgiving dinner grocery store shopping on my credit card. Jesus. I could have so much more money than I do.
@Kate That is the story of my midtwenties life. Yes it is. Also holla at the sudden uptick in weddings I am actually expected to care about this year, there are three and at least two incidents of Gay Marriage Shackups! Thank god I only have to housewarm the latter.
Friday: drinking at the Australian embassy bar! ¥1000. Saturday: festival out of town. Probably like ¥2000 for food/snacks and ¥2000ish for gas/tolls? Sunday: hosting a benefit event at a cafe, probably will spend around ¥2000 on food/drinks. So ¥7000 weekend?
Oh man, I have been there on the bed bug paranoia. I thought I had them last year and buying mattress covers and sprays and cleaning everything was like over $200. Now I have these lovely spiders that like to bite me all night.
Man, I am so glad the weddings extravaganza has yet to hit (I’m 27). I’ve had one a summer for the last few years but I haven’t had to actually BE in one so it’s been relatively cheap?
I was feeling pretty proud of myself for not spending any money Monday-Thursday, but then yesterday I dropped $80 at Target (which I’m splitting with my partner because it was household items (including a barbecue, woo!)) and $35 on groceries so I guess it’s kind of a wash. This weekend I will buy a tank of gas and hopefully not much else. How is the month only half over??
@acid burn You spent < $80 on a barbecue.. ?
@bgprincipessa Yeah, just a little charcoal one. $30, in fact.
When you go to the Batman party as Mr. Freeze, be sure to introduce yourself with “Ice to meet you.”
Oh man, bed bugs are the worst. But fear not! They don’t have to be too expensive, if you’ve got a bit of time on your hands. We got rid of them after a week’s worth of treatment. Garbage bags and duck tape are your new best friend, as are generic brand ziploc bags if you can find them. I bought one plastic tub for like $15 where I stashed clothing that needed to be immediately available during bed bug treatments and that now lives under my bed organizing things. Make best friends with your laundry people because now you get to throw everything you own into the dryer for 2 hours on super hot. All in all, might cost you less than $100, assuming the landlord pays the exterminator.
I was going out of town when we found out we had them–I had to pay for dry cleaning and drop off laundry and it cost like $300 in the end.