The Annotated Bank Statement: “It’s Raining, Again, And It’s Monday”

Page 2 of 7 Statement Period               10-22-11 through 11-21-11
B 14 E A E PA 14 Number of checks enclosed: 0

Account Number: XXX XXXX XXXX
Ending Balance on 11-21-11 $        445.82

Date Posted  Amount ($) Resulting Balances ($) Transactions

10-24        127.81-        681.15 Super Giant #7  10/22 #000226603 Purchase Super Giant #774   Arlington     VA

10-24         55.45-        625.70 Target T1431 T  10/23 #000936019 Purchase Target T1431 Targ  Falls Church  VA

(If you hate your life, you should buy stuff at Target. Because you will feel better, at least while you walk from the store to your car.)

10-24         30.28-        595.42 CheckCard  1022 Goodwill-Glebe Rd Arlington    VA 24210731296207302600077

(Two vintage dresses for the Etsy shop you’ve been meaning to start. A basket for the dog’s toys. Some trashy Tudor-themed romance novels for guilty pleasure reading.) 

10-24         30.00-        565.42 Cvs 01884 0188  10/22 #000254543 Purchase Cvs 01884 01884–  Arlington     VA

10-24         29.23-        536.19 Petsmart Inc 4  10/23 #000071939 Purchase Petsmart Inc 442   Falls Church  VA

(You’re too afraid to clip your dog’s toenails by yourself so you have to pay someone to do it. The dog sees you through the glass grooming window and yelps and yelps until you walk away. He comes out wearing a PetsMart bandanna around his neck, which you immediately take off.)

10-24         20.00-        516.19 BkofAmerica ATM 10/22 #000006630 Withdrwl Arlington          Arlington     VA

10-24         11.05-        505.14 CheckCard  1021 Cvs Pharmacy #2705 Q03 Arlington    VA 24445001295100470807093

10-24         10.36-        494.78 CheckCard  1022 Northside Social Arlington    VA 24055221296286588804702

(A single glass of wine.)

10-24          8.00-        486.78 CheckCard  1021 Impark 00790002 Arlington    VA 24391221294200749100087

10-24          6.54-        480.24 CheckCard  1022 Northside Social Arlington    VA 24055221296286588805139

10-25         96.74-        383.50 Check        136

10-25         14.18-        369.32 CheckCard  1023 Hospice Thrift Shop Falls Church VA 24073141297900013000028

10-25          0.82-        368.50 Keep The Change Transfer To Acct 0546 For 10/25/11

(You are slowly amassing savings with which you will buy a plane ticket to Utah and pretend to be a rock climber and a mountain biker and give yourself over to the wide sky that doesn’t seem to exist in Northern Virginia, everyone here cramped in their hot little cars, their souls all pinstriped and Windsor-knotted.  It’s been two months living in a condo high above a highway and everything feels grey.)

10-25          1.80-        366.70 CheckCard  1024 Bonlook 855-718-1792 Qc 74537871298032533037995

10-26          8.00-        358.70 CheckCard  1025 Impark 00790002 Arlington    VA 24391221298200749800021

10-26          4.05-        354.65 Glebe Market    10/26 #000632031 Purchase Glebe Market       Arlington     VA

(Two avocados, because they’re cheaper here than at the grocery store, and a small jug of milk. The day workers are speaking Spanish outside, waiting for a ride home. They think you can’t speak Spanish but you definitely understand guapa and rizada. You don’t make eye contact, and neither do they.)

10-26          3.37-        351.28 CheckCard  1025 Cafe O2 Arlington    VA 24765011298206000000162

10-26          1.58-        349.70 Keep The Change Transfer To Acct 0546 For 10/26/11

10-27        426.80+        776.50 Place of Employment Inc      Des:Direct Dep ID:6XXXXXXXXXXXX Indn:Murphy,Caroline A       Co ID:9XXXXXXXXX Ppd

(It turns out a master’s degree in creative writing doesn’t guarantee a job you like, or that pays well. Not that you ever expected poems to pay well. Not that the job has anything to do with poems.)

10-27          9.75-        766.75 7-Eleven        10/27 #000791968 Purchase 7-Eleven           Arlington     VA

(Swedish Fish and ice cream. The cashier asks if you want to buy a slice of pizza because you look like someone who wants to eat pizza. You shrug and shake your head, but he’s right. There is no situation in your life when you don’t want to eat pizza.)

10-27          0.25-        766.50 Keep The Change Transfer To Acct 0546 For 10/27/11

10-28        338.88+      1,105.38 BkofAmerica ATM 10/28 #000009569 Deposit Hampden           Baltimore     MD (Checks)

10-28         21.34-      1,084.04 Shell Service   10/28 #000742038 Purchase Shell Service Sta  Arlington     VA

10-28         20.00-      1,064.04 BkofAmerica ATM 10/28 #000009570 Withdrwl Hampden            Baltimore     MD

10-28         15.30-      1,048.74 Whole Foods MA  10/28 #000656760 Purchase Whole Foods Mark   Baltimore     MD

10-28          1.36-      1,047.38 Keep The Change Transfer To Acct 0546 For 10/28/11

10-31         65.00-        982.38 CheckCard  1028 Sprout Inc Baltimore    MD
24258021303980012987469

(Haircut from your favorite hairdresser of all time. She tells you all about her way older boyfriend and you hold off on bangs, again.)

10-31         53.84-        928.54 Super Giant #7  10/31 #000190719 Purchase Super Giant #774   Arlington     VA

10-31         30.57-        897.97 CheckCard  1029 The Health Concern Towson       MD 24435651303200182700547

(A bottle of activated charcoal in anticipation of the hellish post-Halloween hangover.)

10-31         21.20-        876.77 CheckCard  1028 Avenue Antiques Inc Baltimore    MD 24431061302206931700131

10-31         20.00-        856.77 BkofAmerica ATM 10/29 #000007576 Withdrwl Royal Farm #33-F   Baltimore     MD

10-31         10.72-        846.05 CheckCard  1029 Johnny Rad’s Baltimore    MD 24323041303577278013656

(Drunk with friends in costumes at a bar that has skeeball and punk songs.  Shots you don’t buy, a vodka tonic, a beer for your boyfriend, and that one old Bouncing Souls song.)

10-31          1.67-        844.38 Keep The Change Transfer To Acct 0546 For 10/31/11

11-01         77.00-        767.38 CheckCard  1101 T-Mobile.Com*payment 800-937-8997 WA XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

11-01         47.25-        720.13 Paypal           Des:Inst Xfer  ID:4Bv225Bcl9K84 Indn:Caroline Murphy         Co ID:Paypalsi66 Web

11-01         26.21-        693.92 Target T1431 T  11/01 #000207609 Purchase Target T1431 Targ  Falls Church  VA

11-01         18.29-        675.63 CheckCard  1030 Alexanders Tavern Llc Baltimore    MD 24013391304019983120875

(Crab mac and cheese. On your ticket, the waiter calls you “Glasses Lady” because you ordered a water, an iced tea and a lemonade to help ease you out of your hangover. Mascara from your matador costume is somehow stuck under your fingernails, tights itchy on your hot skin, an anxiety attack all the way down I-95 back to Virginia.)

11-01          1.90-        662.13 Keep The Change Transfer To Acct 0546 For 11/01/11

11-02         38.82-        623.31 Paypal           Des:Inst Xfer  ID:4Bv225Bg79B5Y Indn:Caroline Murphy         Co ID:Paypalsi66 Web

11-03         13.73-        609.58 Anthropologie   11/03 #000207379 Purchase Anthropologie 4 A  Washington    DC

(You can’t afford a dress, so you buy a candle. You still get the boho-chic embroideryhead haute-hippie aspirational satisfaction, but you save $100. )

11-03         10.59-        598.99 Madewell #243   11/03 #000191753 Purchase Madewell #243      Washington    DC

11-03          5.62-        593.37 CheckCard  1102 Starbucks Corp00075796 Arlington    VA 24164071306355896354471

11-03          1.06-        592.31 Keep The Change Transfer To Acct 0546 For 11/03/11

11-04         17.45-        574.86 Cvs 01884 0188  11/04 #000959099 Purchase Cvs 01884 01884–  Arlington     VA

11-04          9.02-        565.84 CheckCard  1103 K’s Deli Washington   DC 24435651308286843600080

(Eating a sandwich because fuck gluten anyway and you’ll only be nauseous for a few hours.)

11-04          1.53-        564.31 Keep The Change Transfer To Acct 0546 For 11/04/11

11-07        206.65+        770.96 BkofAmerica ATM 11/05 #000005582 Deposit Arlington          Arlington     VA

11-07        171.79-        599.17 Super Giant #7  11/05 #000442174 Purchase Super Giant #774   Arlington     VA

(Materials for veggie enchiladas and beef stew. Expensive cheese because you like it, even though your boyfriend says it’s wasting money. All-natural peanut butter with that thick oil at the top. Other ingredients for other recipes so you can cook all weekend using the shitty pots and pans of the prefurnished apartment and not ever go out into the new cold. You’re quite content indoors, reading about the bosom-heaving passions of Catherine Howard and taking naps between batches of soup.)

11-07         60.00-        539.17 BkofAmerica ATM 11/05 #000005580 Withdrwl Arlington          Arlington     VA

11-07         25.00-        514.17 CheckCard  1103 Namaste Ventures Inc. 704-5029169  NC 24228991308702489808390

(Apparently, you’re still being charged $25 a month from a yoga website you joined in May and thought you cancelled after the one month trial period was over.)

11-07         19.62-        494.55 CheckCard  1104 Thai Curry Restaurant Arlington    VA 24801621310980000425274

11-07         15.16-        479.39 Target T1431 T  11/07 #000548707 Purchase Target T1431 Targ  Falls Church  VA

11-07          8.61-        470.78 CheckCard  1106 Nfi*www.Netflix.Com/Cc Netflix.Com  CA 24692161310000595803683 Recurring

(Downton Abbey. Watching Downton Abbey with the laptop propped up on the toilet while you take a bath and eat Swedish Fish, watching Downton Abbey in bed after work, watching Downton Abbey curled into a ball on the couch that isn’t yours, dog curled into a ball by your feet. It’s raining, again, and it’s Monday. Your throat hurts. You’re here. You’re awake. You watch.)

 

Carrie Murphy is a poet and writer. She blogs about food at Plums in the Icebox.

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29 Comments / Post A Comment

highjump (#39)

The DC metro area is so expensive!

Genghis Khat (#584)

@highjump It’s a disgusting face.

Shop at the columbia heights target, carrie! I’ll give you free bags!
(Because religion and the middle east also do not pay the bills.)

Genghis Khat (#584)

@Genghis Khat OMG FACT. A disgusting FACT.

No editing on the billfold! Your face is lovely!

@highjump When I told my friends I was moving from DC to NYC, much of the reaction was, “BUT NYC IS SO EXPENSIVE!” But actually, DC is also SO EXPENSIVE…and food can be found cheaper in NYC. I feel like you can’t get a meal for under $15 in DC.

MuffyStJohn (#280)

@dj pomegranate Jesus yes! I visited NYC this weekend and enjoyed a lovely brunch for two for under $25 with tip. I can’t get a damend waffle in my neighborhood for less than $18.

I finally registered as a Billfold commenter just to say:

We’re neighbors! I go to that Target and Goodwill a lot! What are your favorite thrift stores around here?

@bowtiesarecool hi! i actually don’t live in arlington anymore, in alexandria now (northern VA still sucks). i love capital caring and unique in falls church, though! how about you?

@Carrie Murphy@twitter Oh man Unique. I either hit a home run or leave that place absolutely disgusted. There’s a Goodwill that just opened up on Annandale Road near 50 that is the BOMB. And it’s new, so it doesn’t have much of a Musty Goodwill Funk yet. Also, 10% discount for Capital One customers. The Hospice place in Seven Corners by the Rte. 50 Goodwill that has a random assortment of sometimes surprisingly nice things mixed in with the horrifying polyester suits – I found a really cheap silver coffee set there once.

And actually, I work in Alexandria, and have big plans to scope out the hideously overpriced consignment shops in Old Town soon.

Thrifting squee!

bgprincipessa (#699)

I feel like every website ever is always talking about NYC, and then very occasionally DC. The mentions of Baltimore – and places I actually frequent! – are super-exciting to me in my small world.

Awesome concept, great execution. That line about how “you will feel better, at least while you walk from the store to your car” is soooo true.

Sarah H. (#408)

Oh man, this felt like looking at my bank statements (and I’m in the DC area, too). “How did I go to CVS five times in the past two weeks? What did I spend that cash on, anyway? Oh god, those drinks were HOW MUCH?!”

Your boyfriend is so, so wrong about the expensive cheese.

Megano! (#124)

@anachronistique Yes! I came down here to say that! Expensive cheese, expensive chocolate, never, ever, ever not worth it.

@anachronistique I have never regretted buying expensive cheese…nope, not ever.

Maladydee (#909)

@anachronistique The only time I have ever regretted buying chocolate is when I buy the cheap stuff, in fact.

HaleyM (#886)

Oh man, Arlington. You do wonder what the hell you are doing here, all the time, and why people are wearing ties and topsiders on a Sunday, and why there is a line to get into a bar that is awful and basically indistiguishable from about 10 others within 3 blocks (Clarendon).

@HaleyM Another Arlington resident here, nodding in agreement.

@HaleyM i’ve lived in the area for 9 months (now in alexandria, which is better) but i pretty much despise it.

HaleyM (#886)

@Carrie Murphy@twitter Alexandria! I’d live there if I could afford to be in/near Old Town.

Tatiana (#194)

“You can’t afford a dress, so you buy a candle.” My relationship with Anthropologie exactly.

jfruh (#161)

Baltimore! BAALTIMORE. Do it! Surely the commute is worth not living in NoVa?

kellyography (#250)

Hampden, hon! Whenever I make the venture down to Baltimore, I go right near that salon to Golden West and get sopapilla with my friends. Loved this little feature.

If you hate your life, you should buy stuff at Target. Because you will feel better, at least while you walk from the store to your car.

My relationship with Target, exactly. Though I did once spend an hour in there and leave with nothing at all! That was a victory.

chic noir (#713)

@Holden Cauliflower – You must share your secret my dear.

chic noir (#713)

Target and that best with many backs aka WalMart are the devil. I swear I go in thinking I’m only going to buy like three thinks and maybe spend no more than 15 bucks. Yet somehow buy the time I get to the register, I have half a cart of stuff and my bill is between 50-60 dollars.

I never have this problem when I’m shopping in a drug store like CVS or Duane Reade.

chic noir (#713)

Carrie,

I see that you used your deditcard at Starbucks. Are you aware of the Starbucks bonus program where you get register a Starbucks card online and get a free drink for every 14 or 15? You also get free syrup and soy milk.

MuffyStJohn (#280)

I’m actually becoming somewhat frightened by the slavish devotion to Sprout. This is like the third person I’ve seen mention traveling at least a semi-ridiculous distance to get their hair done there. Are the stylists there magical? Can they do something about my permanent Alfalfa cowlick or encourage my hair to go gray faster or something?

@MuffyStJohn i’m originally from baltimore and have gotten my hair cut at sprout off and on for four years. it’s a nice atmosphere and they do a good job. ann’s my stylist.

“Watching Downton Abbey with the laptop propped up on the toilet while you take a bath and eat Swedish Fish”
I love this sentence so so much

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