How to Owe the Government $6,452
To start: Don’t estimate or pay quarterly taxes like smart people/the law tell you to.
1. Enter 1099-Misc for $30,300 (blogging income, no taxes taken out) into tax prep program.
2. Enter two W-2′s for $2,204.25 (retail income, taxes taken out) into tax prep program.
3. Quit at the part where tax software tells you to start making deductions based on expenses incurred.
4. Because: you need receipts (ha, what receipts?) and perhaps also a professional.
5. But wouldn’t it be nice to get it done now? (Yes.) Maybe you can figure it out.
6. Go back to that part and try to wing it.
7. Get stumped on the first question, about how you claimed expenses on your car last year (“In the first year that you deducted a business expense for this vehicle, did you use the standard mileage rate to determine your deduction?” I HAVE NO IDEA ABOUT THAT ONE, TURBOTAX. Nor do I have any idea where last year’s tax return is so that I might tell you about it).
8. Quit again.
9. File extension.
10. On extension form, estimate taxes owed as $2,000 (wishful thinking?)
11. Don’t pay anything even though you’re supposed to because: With what money? Also: Interest/fees for not paying won’t be much, yet.
12. Make note to call tax professional.
13. Go to bar.
New Billfold drinking game: When an article comes up, see if you can guess whether Logan wrote it based on the headline. If you’re right, take a drink. If it takes you until the first sentence, take two drinks. If you start to get a knot in your stomach by the end of the first paragraph, drink until you no longer want to establish a financial conservatorship on her behalf and convince her to sign away her rights to spend her own money.
LOGAN PLEASE JUST LET US TAKE CARE OF YOU IN A TOTALLY NON-JUDGMENTAL, NON-PATRONIZING WAY, OH MY GOD
This is me every day. She gets it, but we just need to find the thing that will make her pivot in the right direction.
@melis Though if that’s how much she makes, I totally understand now!
I swear to all that is holy, her posts are turning me into my Republican father.
ALSO “BLOGGING INCOME”
Did you come up with $2,000 because that’s what I said casually in a gchat a few hours ago? … That’s concerning.
or you just live in a developing country and MAKE about 2X what logan owes the government and don’t have to pay anything, wheeeeeee.
@halfheartedyoga less than 2X, actually. Anyway. I can’t judge, I totally pulled a Logan when a previous employer insisted on treating me like an independent contractor despite making me sign an EMPLOYMENT CONTRACT with silly requirements like what time to be at work. :(
from the fine folks at TVTropes: “A woobie … is that character you want to give a big hug, wrap in a blanket and feed soup to when he or she suffers so very beautifully.”
when I read Logan’s posts, more & more I think “Logan’s basically the Woobie of personal finance” :-) keep on keeping on, there