Comments on: Girls and the Hot Mess http://thebillfold.com/2012/04/girls-and-the-hot-mess/ Everything About Money You Were Too Polite To Ask Tue, 18 Jun 2013 04:32:39 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: novembertea http://thebillfold.com/2012/04/girls-and-the-hot-mess/#comment-18060 novembertea Sat, 22 Sep 2012 16:51:01 +0000 http://thebillfold.com/?p=1935#comment-18060 I loved this piece!! I loved this piece!!

]]> By: Lemonnier http://thebillfold.com/2012/04/girls-and-the-hot-mess/#comment-1479 Lemonnier Thu, 26 Apr 2012 03:10:49 +0000 http://thebillfold.com/?p=1935#comment-1479 @girlsownlove I too had a dirtbag, man-about-town friend who never quite had his shit together, who passed away. And the city where he lived allowed him to never get his shit together, and allowed him to surround himself with the very dysfunctional or the very young, who couldn't see how out-of-hand his behavior was, and it ultimately played a role in killing him. But it's a false dichotomy to think that knowing how to be in and explore a city, and having your shit together, are mutually exclusive. There is room in anyone's life to both "really be in this place" and have your shit together. Anyone who tells you differently is just romanticizing being a mess, or making excuses for why they are one. @girlsownlove I too had a dirtbag, man-about-town friend who never quite had his shit together, who passed away. And the city where he lived allowed him to never get his shit together, and allowed him to surround himself with the very dysfunctional or the very young, who couldn’t see how out-of-hand his behavior was, and it ultimately played a role in killing him. But it’s a false dichotomy to think that knowing how to be in and explore a city, and having your shit together, are mutually exclusive. There is room in anyone’s life to both “really be in this place” and have your shit together. Anyone who tells you differently is just romanticizing being a mess, or making excuses for why they are one.

]]> By: Lindsay Katai http://thebillfold.com/2012/04/girls-and-the-hot-mess/#comment-1221 Lindsay Katai Fri, 20 Apr 2012 19:49:24 +0000 http://thebillfold.com/?p=1935#comment-1221 @Andrea Karim@facebook I think it depends on how many you have and whether it becomes an exercise in self-hatred. @Andrea Karim@facebook I think it depends on how many you have and whether it becomes an exercise in self-hatred.

]]> By: Andrea Karim@facebook http://thebillfold.com/2012/04/girls-and-the-hot-mess/#comment-1110 Andrea Karim@facebook Thu, 19 Apr 2012 21:52:32 +0000 http://thebillfold.com/?p=1935#comment-1110 I refuse to believe that blackhead removal is a bad idea. I refuse to believe that blackhead removal is a bad idea.

]]> By: bustedsneakers http://thebillfold.com/2012/04/girls-and-the-hot-mess/#comment-1044 bustedsneakers Thu, 19 Apr 2012 14:38:51 +0000 http://thebillfold.com/?p=1935#comment-1044 My friends made fun of me for meeting a nice girl and deciding to be an adult all at once, but what actually happened was I met a 7-year-old who judged me as only a child can on the mess, and I decided all at once I was done. I want kids. Kids are hard. You need to be emotionally together and have money and be trustworthy, because they notice in a way adults just don't care about. I also finally got a job that paid Grown Up Money. It took years. There weren't any jobs I knew how to get, no-one cared how I did at work, there just wasn't anything out there at all in my field. So I changed my field. I'm so glad I'm not going to be twentysomething soon, because I was so, so, so bad at Being Young. My friends made fun of me for meeting a nice girl and deciding to be an adult all at once, but what actually happened was I met a 7-year-old who judged me as only a child can on the mess, and I decided all at once I was done. I want kids. Kids are hard. You need to be emotionally together and have money and be trustworthy, because they notice in a way adults just don’t care about.

I also finally got a job that paid Grown Up Money. It took years. There weren’t any jobs I knew how to get, no-one cared how I did at work, there just wasn’t anything out there at all in my field. So I changed my field.

I’m so glad I’m not going to be twentysomething soon, because I was so, so, so bad at Being Young.

]]> By: POSSIBLYMAYBE http://thebillfold.com/2012/04/girls-and-the-hot-mess/#comment-1002 POSSIBLYMAYBE Thu, 19 Apr 2012 01:12:47 +0000 http://thebillfold.com/?p=1935#comment-1002 @Pistachio you got it. Bjork seems to have a strong manic pixie dream girls following. Good article...motivated me early this morning to put my finances on mint.com. @Pistachio you got it. Bjork seems to have a strong manic pixie dream girls following.

Good article…motivated me early this morning to put my finances on mint.com.

]]> By: Pistachio http://thebillfold.com/2012/04/girls-and-the-hot-mess/#comment-968 Pistachio Wed, 18 Apr 2012 19:56:50 +0000 http://thebillfold.com/?p=1935#comment-968 @POSSIBLYMAYBE Uno, is your name from the Bjork song? BECAUSE I LOVE THAT SONG. Dos, yeah, MPDG can be fun to do, but I often felt I was doing it to please men/boys, rather than because it was a natural expression of my personality. I'm actually pretty uptight, loverboy, don't let these 3 am porch chats make you think otherwise. @POSSIBLYMAYBE

Uno, is your name from the Bjork song? BECAUSE I LOVE THAT SONG.

Dos, yeah, MPDG can be fun to do, but I often felt I was doing it to please men/boys, rather than because it was a natural expression of my personality. I’m actually pretty uptight, loverboy, don’t let these 3 am porch chats make you think otherwise.

]]> By: Koko Goldstein http://thebillfold.com/2012/04/girls-and-the-hot-mess/#comment-957 Koko Goldstein Wed, 18 Apr 2012 18:40:06 +0000 http://thebillfold.com/?p=1935#comment-957 This is amazing timing. I am interviewing for a promotion at work in about two hours. I've been kind of terrified, because while it's mostly all good, it means a bit of growing up. More responsibility, more visibility, better outfits and not being 15 minutes late every day. It's been scary, probably more scary than it should be. But I'm beginning to be okay with it and this helped! Most of my friends are living paycheck to paycheck or unemployed. It's frustrating at this point, our late 20's/early 30's, because I want to do big things. I want to go on group vacations or travel abroad together. But my friends can never go because they aren't making any money and what they do make gets spent on dining out and massages. Sigh. This is amazing timing. I am interviewing for a promotion at work in about two hours. I’ve been kind of terrified, because while it’s mostly all good, it means a bit of growing up. More responsibility, more visibility, better outfits and not being 15 minutes late every day. It’s been scary, probably more scary than it should be. But I’m beginning to be okay with it and this helped!

Most of my friends are living paycheck to paycheck or unemployed. It’s frustrating at this point, our late 20′s/early 30′s, because I want to do big things. I want to go on group vacations or travel abroad together. But my friends can never go because they aren’t making any money and what they do make gets spent on dining out and massages. Sigh.

]]> By: Lindsay Katai http://thebillfold.com/2012/04/girls-and-the-hot-mess/#comment-953 Lindsay Katai Wed, 18 Apr 2012 17:44:30 +0000 http://thebillfold.com/?p=1935#comment-953 @cmcm That's an interesting point. I wonder how much seeing other people's lives on Facebook has driven us to be a contrast. @cmcm That’s an interesting point. I wonder how much seeing other people’s lives on Facebook has driven us to be a contrast.

]]> By: Lindsay Katai http://thebillfold.com/2012/04/girls-and-the-hot-mess/#comment-952 Lindsay Katai Wed, 18 Apr 2012 17:42:28 +0000 http://thebillfold.com/?p=1935#comment-952 @hi, you@twitter @lalland Absolutely. I think the trick is distinguishing between the stuff that truly isn't your fault and IS just about being young and the stuff that you're secretly in control of. We tell ourselves these stories like, "I'm such a scatterbrain" or "I'm terrible with money" to excuse our behavior, but then we let that story/excuse dictate who we are and it becomes a self-fulfilling prophesy. We can change! We can create new stories! @hi, you@twitter @lalland Absolutely. I think the trick is distinguishing between the stuff that truly isn’t your fault and IS just about being young and the stuff that you’re secretly in control of. We tell ourselves these stories like, “I’m such a scatterbrain” or “I’m terrible with money” to excuse our behavior, but then we let that story/excuse dictate who we are and it becomes a self-fulfilling prophesy. We can change! We can create new stories!

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